In a relationship, when one person is a spender and the other person is a saver, money becomes the elephant in the room. This is sad but true. Can different habits in a relationship lead to normal spending? We have spoken to several guys who are very happily married to Ukrainian women. They all agree that managing finances well is key in a marriage.
Find out your money values.
Here is a typical example which explains money values clearly:
Eating out and going overseas for holidays could be someone’s way of showing how much they are in love with their partner. But the other person may think cooking dinner at home together is a much more relaxing activity. When these two people are in a relationship, their very different values determine their different habits, so sooner or later, money will become an issue.
Honesty is the best policy.
The fastest way to erode trust in a relationship is to argue about money or lie about money. Therefore, you have to be honest with each other about your financial situation from the beginning. I recommend not spending beyond your means while dating simply to impress your partner, because if you look more generous than who you really are, this behavior will be expected later on, and it’s almost impossible to undo what’s already been done.
Find a happy medium.
In order to truly succeed as a couple with very different habits, you have to find a satisfactory compromise. For instance, one Saturday you eat at the cheap Chinese restaurant near your place, and the next Saturday you go to a high-end restaurant in the city center.
Have a shared financial blueprint.
You would be well-advised to sit down with your partner and have a money date regularly. That means every fortnight, you two discuss your money management and financial goals in an honest way. This will surely help keep those money arguments at bay!
On the money date, you can look at your bank accounts, evaluate your spending and work on a budget. This routine will improve your financial situation and make your love life much more satisfying!
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How do these guys talk with their Ukrainian women about finances?
Money is a taboo topic in our culture, but it’s a very important topic – money is the No. 1 reason for divorce in almost every country. That means talking about money is paramount in a relationship, even though it’s not the easiest thing in the world.
1. Talk about your financial expectations in a candid way.
Addressing the tough conversation is absolutely critical to setting up a solid foundation for a successful relationship. Frankly, waiting until you already have a money problem means it’s probably too late; therefore, you should talk openly about your financial expectations, thereby setting the stage for a sustainable relationship.
You can begin with baby steps, e.g., letting your partner know your credit score, and then you can mention retirement plan later. This will strengthen the emotional connection in your relationship and improve your financial, physical and mental health.
2. How to talk about finances tactfully:
First and foremost, you can frame questions as ‘What if…’ This is a way to understand your partner’s psychology by asking some broader questions. Here are some good examples:
A) “If you won the lottery, what would you do with a large amount of money?”
B) “If you don’t have to go to work, which career would you choose?”
In the second place, you can cite a blog article about finances and couples. A case in point: “Today I read this blog post about having a money talk with your partner. Shall we try this new idea?”
3. Share a goal with your Ukrainian woman.
This is a way to bring up finances under the radar – you simply bring up a financial goal that you would like to share with your Ukrainian lady. For instance, you can say this to your partner, “Let’s say we are going to buy a house in five years; we should have a money goal, right? Let’s hold each other accountable and save money from now on.”
“Ukrainian women are wise wives.”
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Olga loves travelling and learning about different cultures. She enjoys taking photos, trying new foods, and spending time outdoors. A skilled writer, Olga is a language enthusiast as well. She enjoys meeting new people from around the world and trying out new recipes in her kitchen.
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