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Acceptable Lies on a First Date

June 5, 2019 at 11.12am by
Man and woman on a date

As a general rule, dishonesty is never encouraged in dating. Well, it does apply in every aspect of our lives. Whether it is your relationship with your parents, friends, significant other or boss, telling lies is a big no-no! However, there will always be times when you’d wish you said something else or probably kept certain things to yourself. Why? Because many times, the truth leads to trouble – trouble which could have been entirely avoided if you told acceptable lies.

Lies, whether they’re the white variety or the kind that come from a bad place, have corresponding repercussions. So when do lies become acceptable? When are you allowed to be less than little honest? For valid reasons, telling lies on a first date is justifiable as long as it’s only temporary and they are not too large. Otherwise, you might find yourself losing that one shot at finally finding the one you’ve been waiting for all because you lied. 

So what are the acceptable lies you can tell on a first date?

Your name

No, this isn’t permission to adopt a new identity. You can’t go from being an Emily to introducing yourself as Charlotte. If you’re looking for a hookup, that’s completely understandable and acceptable. However, if the reason you’re even dating in the first place is to end up in a relationship, it’s an absolute no-no.

What this means is you don’t have to give them your full name. You don’t even have to tell them your given name. If your parents named you Emily, it’s fine if you introduce yourself by your nickname Emma.

So, why is lying a little about your name advisable? It’s because there’s no guarantee that your date will go well or will lead to more dates. For safety purposes, use your nickname. That way, you can avoid creeps who will definitely stalk you online once they get the chance to.

Your address

Lying about your address is also suggested for your safety. You don’t want to run the risk of your horrible date showing up at your door completely unannounced, with a bouquet of roses and chocolates and an apology for insulting you on your first date. Chances are that many of the first dates won’t lead to second, third, fourth, or fifth dates. So, don’t give away your address just yet unless you want unwelcome visitors turning up at your door.

Lying about your address isn’t permission to fake your identity, as well. Don’t tell them you live in an upscale neighborhood just because you want to impress them or feel superior.

Your five year plan

This isn’t a job interview so there’s no need to let your date know where you see yourself five years from now. Yes, your ultimate goal may be to find a loving and happy relationship. However, telling your date that you want to be happily married and become a parent to adorable kids isn’t going to fool them into thinking that you’re insanely attracted to them. Remember this is a first date and not a marriage proposal.

Your culinary preferences

Allergies are understandable and are one of the things that you should never lie about. So, if he offers you a bite of his rotisserie chicken, say no, instead of politely tasting his food. But don’t forget to offer an explanation. Instead of lying to them about how you dislike the texture and taste of chicken, just tell them that you’re allergic to chicken. Trust me. Even if you bring antihistamine with you, it won’t work like magic and prevent you from having allergic reactions.

Your exact job title

No, don’t lie about your job. Don’t say you’re a model when you’re a primary school teacher. Again, this is a date, not a job interview. Instead of telling them what you do for a living, tell them the things you like about the industry you work in.

Your annual salary

This is pretty self-explanatory. Don’t tell them how much you make. Be modest and don’t brag or complain about how much you get paid. First dates aren’t a suitable time to give them a sneak peek of your bank account.

Your thoughts upon seeing their profile

This is applicable when you’re dating someone you met through online dating. Yes, you believe in love at first sight. But you know better than to date someone just because they’re attractive.

Their profiles probably contain a little description of their personality or, at least, how they see themselves. If you found them a little boring and archived their profile to narrow down your choices, but later decided to give them a chance, that’s okay. But don’t give them a detailed narration of your step by step process when selecting who you want to date. Besides, it’s just not polite.

Your dating history

In this day and age, it’s totally okay to go on as many first dates. The logic behind it is you don’t want to miss out on possibly the love of your life. If the night before, you went out on a date with someone else, your current date doesn’t need to know. Exclusivity is decided upon after a few dates.

Your current life state

First dates are meant to be fun. This isn’t your support group where you air out every bit of your dirty laundry for everyone to see. Or even if you met your date in the aforementioned support group, it still isn’t advisable to talk about your life dramas on a date. Whining about life takes the fun and romance out of dates. Show a positive attitude, that’s more attractive.

How much you’ve enjoyed their company

So, the night comes to a close. By now, you’ve probably formed an opinion about your date. If you want to see them again, it’s because you’ve enjoyed the time you’ve spent with them. If you can’t wait to leave that place, it’s because they’re just not the type you’re looking for.

And there’s nothing wrong about that. However, that’s still not a license to tell them that you’ve had the absolute worst time. Politeness can go a long way. Who knows? You might meet them again under different circumstances.

Flattery

Flattering someone or making them feel good about themselves doesn’t always have to be based on a lie. However, sometimes it does. Telling your date they look good or laughing at a corny joke can be acceptable lies on a first date. Regardless of what form it is, a little flattery can go a long way. 

Family relationships

There’s no such thing as a perfect family. Nobody comes from a perfect home. There will always be issues but that isn’t something that should really be discussed on a first date. Avoid talking about your emotional baggage but there’s no need to make up an entire lie. What you can do is to breeze past questions that are a little too personal or emotional, especially when it concerns your relationships with your family members. Save it for the succeeding dates when you two are already comfortable with each other.

Your past relationships

If things work out between you and your date, you will eventually learn about each other’s relationship history. However, first dates aren’t the perfect time to talk about it. Take it easy on the oversharing. In the meantime, just tell them that things didn’t quite work out in the past but there’s no need to let them know how you had your heart broken. At least, not now.

Date location

Some people put a lot of effort into planning a first date. So when your date brings you to a restaurant you’ve tried before, you don’t have to let them know you came there a couple of years ago. Otherwise, you’ll be deflating their confidence and burst their excitement.

It’s also the same when your date has surprised you with an activity you didn’t entirely expect. It won’t hurt to tell them it was a lovely idea even if you don’t think it is.

That you share similar interests they do

So maybe you want to have a second or third date perhaps, but you have no idea about the recent movie they are talking about. And since you’re also into movies, it wouldn’t be bad if you lie a little and tell them you’re looking forward to seeing that movie, too. Who knows, it might help you get a next date at the movies?

How much you’ve stalked them

Thanks to social media, we now have the power to do a little research about someone before meeting them in person. However, even if you’ve already checked their photos, found out more about their interests and know the history of their relationships, be sure not to spill it during your date. Be careful not to drop a hint that you’ve done your research as it might creep them out. Just keep asking questions to sound interested and clueless. Besides, there’s so much more to learn about a person besides the information found on their social media.

How much you drink

If you’re hanging out at a bar on your first date, the best thing to do is to lie about how much you like to drink. No matter how high your alcohol tolerance is, it’s never a good idea to make that known during your first date. Just keep that information to yourself because you don’t want them to think you’re alcoholic or unstable.

How you feel about them

While there are unsuccessful first dates, there are amazing dates, too. However, even if you really enjoyed your time with your date and look forward to seeing them again, you shouldn’t make it obvious. It’s okay to thank them and let them know you’ve had a great time. But that’s it. Do not overdo it and avoid making them feel you got attached too easily. It might just push them away.

First dates are a perfect time to get to know someone better and that is why honesty and truthfulness are expected. However, to make sure you stay away from trouble and help you score a chance at a second date, telling the acceptable lies in this list would be totally fine.

Ready to find an ideal match or potential date? Please feel free to visit Ukraine Brides Agency. 

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