Find time to nurture your international relationship

November 15, 2020 at 10.18am by in International Dating
international dating

Feeling overwhelmed and not having enough time to nurture your international relationship? Well, chances are you’ve said yes too frequently. People who have mastered the art of saying no are certainly more relaxed!

⦁ Know when to say no.

Saying no doesn’t make you a bad person. It only makes you more assertive.

If something doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. You don’t need further evidence because your intuition is always telling you the truth (but many people have talked themselves out of their intuition). Never underestimate the power of women’s intuition. When your body feels contraction rather than expansion, it’s your body’s wisdom that is trying to tell you it’s a no.

Say no kindly, sincerely and early. Saying no doesn’t mean you are rude. You can be very kind and still say no. Other people will appreciate your honesty when you are kind and sincere.

Also, you should say no early. When you know something is a bit off, you would be well-advised to say no quickly because if it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no. Life is too short to waste time on the wrong things.

From Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) to Joy of Missing Out (JOMO): Many people can’t say no because of FOMO. But those who can say no have definitely understood JOMO!

JOMO means you know what you want, so you can easily focus on your goals rather than distractions!

⦁ How to remain positive in an international relationship:

Life is not about having positivity all day, every day. Life is also about dealing with negativity when challenges rock up because difficult situations will arise – that’s a given.

Is that negativity or is that feedback? Sometimes helpful feedback can pose as negativity. Let’s say your clients are complaining about you – that’s not necessarily negativity because it can be constructive feedback if you think about it more carefully.

Reframe the situation. If it’s actually negativity, you have to reframe the situation. A woman that I know lost her job due to the pandemic. That’s obviously negativity. But because she lost her job, she started her own business. Now she has a business that is already working. In other words, she has become a successful entrepreneur in spite of “negativity”, because of “negativity”.

So, how can you reframe the difficult situation and make it work for you?

Turn negativity into empowerment. Negativity is unavoidable in life because you are only human. However, there are many ways to turn negativity into empowerment:

⦁ Learn the lessons.
⦁ Be more resilient.
⦁ Use the lessons that you’ve learned and your resilience to become a more empowered woman!

Focus on what makes you happy. After you’ve tried your best, you need to do what makes you happy. Feel like dressing up and going to a concert? Do that! Feel like sleeping in and ordering a take-out? Do that!

⦁ How to achieve full acceptance and find peace in life:

Research shows that most anxieties come from being unable to accept oneself. When you fully accept yourself, you become calm!

Know your strengths and focus on your strengths. What are you good at? What do you love doing? Usually, what you are good at and what you love doing are the same activity. Make sure you find out your strengths and focus on those because your strengths are the most important part of who you are!

Know your weaknesses and minimize their impact. Nobody is perfect because perfection is a joke – it doesn’t exist. Frankly, your weaknesses make your life a rich experience – it gives your life texture.

Having said that, you can still minimize your weaknesses’ impact by working with mentors and coaches. Having the right guidance is so key.

Do what you can and make peace with the rest. Find out what’s under your control and what’s outside your control. Do what you can control and then make peace with things that are outside your control. That’s how you have full acceptance in life. This is certainly good for your international relationship.

False Comfort VS Wise Mind: American psychologist Sally Winston claims that when you seek reassurance in order to deal with your anxiety, what you can get is just false comfort. In contrast, when you fully accept yourself and stop letting anxieties bother you, you are listening to your wise mind!

“An international relationship requires your time and attention. You need to make time for your relationship so that love can keep growing.”

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