How to maintain a happy relationship with a Ukrainian woman

Slavic dating

I understand that some men are extremely busy these days because the competition in the workplace is real. Therefore, I interviewed our dating coaches who have lots of insights into this area as well. Here’s their advice:

How to have more time for your Ukrainian lady:

Do a brain detox by writing down everything you must do. Choose 7 things that are important in order to have a great week. These are your 7 catalysts. Identify 3 things that must be done tomorrow amongst these seven things. Break the seal by figuring out several actionable steps. Decide your wake-up time and stick to it. Schedule your musts. Allocate some time for your admin hour. Know your top 1% tasks – these are usually about your health and non-negotiables. Have two check points in a day. Look at matching tasks, i.e. activities that can be done at the same time, e.g. when you are in the gym, you can listen to an audiobook. Then you can use this system to plan the next day. Remember: intensity leads to productivity. Duration doesn’t lead to productivity. There is always enough time if you can manage your time like this, and then you will have time to go out with your lady from Ukraine.

How to stay happily married when you are too busy:

In contemporary society, many people wear busyness as a badge of honor. They think they can look high-value if they are constantly busy. That’s why exhaustion and burnout are so common these days. Sadly, social media platforms have made the situation even worse because people always think they should do more in order to look better than their friends on Facebook or Instagram.

As I see it, rather than comparing ourselves to those who are showing the highlight of their lives on the Internet and finding ourselves lacking, reading all of the research findings and deciding we must do more for our marriages, our kids, our jobs and our communities, or following every piece of self-help advice and jamming our lives so full of improvements that we don’t even have enough space to enjoy the so-called improved-upon life, now is the right time for us to let it be enough.

“The mainstream culture’s obsession with thinking we should do more and be more shows up most acutely in our marriages and our work lives,” says Darren J., a British guy who is married to a Ukrainian wife, “I went to Ukraine last year to see my wife – at that time I just met her on an international dating site, so I decided to meet her in person. When I was in Ukraine, I realized that people in Ukraine don’t value busyness that much. It was an eye-opening experience there.”

Indeed, most people in western countries have been conditioned to believe that the way to be valuable is to always go the extra mile, to always put in more hours at work, to always put in more effort in their marriages, to always do more and more and more. However, I guess by now you can understand why more isn’t necessarily better and how deliberately using breaks and pulling back can really lead to the same, if not better results, let alone preserving your health and wellbeing.

How to remain happy:

After getting married, the pressure to show up more and more as a spouse and to drown our kids in attention, affection, love and activities can bring the strongest parent to their knees with feelings of inadequacy and burnout & wondering whether he/she is doing enough or not. This is especially true in modern western culture.

But Darren’s Ukrainian wife has revealed a different perspective. “Doing less is the path to better results and wellbeing in my marriage,” says Darren’s wife from Ukraine, “When I start to manage my energy more efficiently, I’m validated with better health and wellbeing. My husband and I run a successful business. We are also validated with more clients, better testimonials, getting more things done and making more money.”

That means doing less can be very powerful. It can be a lifestyle which simply requires a vigilance to dismantle the programming that runs the majority of western work culture, i.e. more is always better.

“Also, you should build an amazing lifestyle. If your lifestyle is already amazing, make it even more amazing! Remember that high-value men have interesting lifestyles that excite them every day. High-value men are proud of their desirable lifestyles. If there is something that he wants to try, he won’t wait until his friends do it as well because he just does it regardless.”

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