Keeping the Spark Alive: Nurturing Your International Relationship through Individuality

When we are very keen to take care of a relationship, we might assume that everything we do has to directly nurture this relationship. Yet I would argue that the best way to keep an international relationship is to strike a balance: Yes, you contribute to the relationship; meanwhile, you also maintain your own individuality.

A very important metaphor:

Last week I read a book on regenerative agriculture which is about soil health: If the farmer prioritizes the quality of the soil, the farm becomes healthier, more productive and more resilient, so the revenue increases. That’s why planting cover crops rather than cash crops prevents the soil from eroding by holding the soil in place, improving the microbiome of the soil and increasing biodiversity as well as water retention. Therefore, when the farmer is ready to plant the cash crop next time, the actual harvest is much more profitable, more abundant and more nutrient-dense. What’s more, cover crops don’t require lots of pesticides and chemical fertilizers, so they are more eco-friendly, too.

Some examples in international relationships…

Let’s think about how this theory applies to other areas of life. If you run a business, your physical health and emotional energy are just like the soil. You have to spend time rejuvenating and having more rest in order to run a successful business. That’s why it’s so important to have days off every week.

If you are in an international relationship, it’s tempting to do every activity with your partner because you are so in love with her. However, at the same time, you also need to think about how you can stay in love without losing yourself – you need to maintain your own individuality in a relationship: What are your hobbies and interests that you would like to pursue? What are your career goals? Do you proactively build and keep a social circle? These are important areas of your life that shouldn’t be ignored. Interestingly, when you pay attention to other areas of your life in the right ways, your partner will find you more attractive because you are a multidimensional person with different flavours!

Another way to understand this theory:

If you are an entrepreneur, you are probably very good at monetizing things, so it’s tempting to try to monetize every activity that you love doing. But if you actually do that, it might deplete the soil health. Let me explain.

You have to give the soil some time to rest through growing a crop which is not meant to be sold on the market. Then when you grow a crop that will go to market, the success will be bigger. In other words, you don’t have to monetize every passion – cover crops are extremely necessary to keep the ecosystem abundant and healthy, so when you give yourself the time and permission to grow cover crops, your cash crops will become more profitable and more successful. That is to say, you have to let nature be your ultimate guide for ideal business practices because nature is always right.

Now when we look at an international relationship in this way, we can see that in order to nourish a relationship correctly, we can’t ignore our individuality. So, if you spend more time in the gym, please don’t feel guilty simply because you aren’t spending time with your partner. You are the most important person in the universe; thus, your health and well-being are the prerequisites of a successful relationship.

Taking the time to invest in yourself and your own growth can lead to increased self-awareness, confidence, and a greater ability to communicate effectively with your partner. It’s important to remember that you are more than just one half of a couple – you are an individual with unique needs, goals, and passions.

By embracing your individuality and continuing to pursue your own personal development, you can bring new energy and vitality to your relationship and build a strong foundation for a happy, fulfilling life together.

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Olga P

Olga loves travelling and learning about different cultures. She enjoys taking photos, trying new foods, and spending time outdoors. A skilled writer, Olga is a language enthusiast as well. She enjoys meeting new people from around the world and trying out new recipes in her kitchen.