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Interview with a responsible & successful guy who is married to a Ukrainian bride

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Today I interviewed Brad V., an American man who is married to a bride from Ukraine. Because he is one of the most popular members on an international dating site, we might learn a thing or two from his insights.

To be responsible, you must keep promises with others; to be successful, you must keep promises with yourself.

Me: You are happily married and your Ukrainian wife is beautiful. What’s your secret sauce?

Brad: We make promises to others all the time, and we feel guilty when we break our promises. Oftentimes, we put commitments to other people above our own priorities. However, when it comes to keeping promises with ourselves, we aren’t very careful. As I see it, promises aren’t something to be taken lightly, and it’s the promises that we make to ourselves that we should be the most careful with. In my marriage, I always keep promises with my Ukrainian wife. Meanwhile, I also keep promises with myself.

Me: Can you give us some examples, please?

Brad: When I met my wife on the Ukrainian women dating site, I told her that I would visit Ukraine and meet her in person within 3 months. And I did it. I promised her that I would marry her within 6 months after seeing her in person, and I made it. I promised her that she doesn’t have to go to work if she chooses to be a housewife, and I’ve made it happen because I run a successful business. At the same time, I promised myself that I go to the gym every day, and I’ve been doing exactly that for one year. I also told myself that I would not eat sugar and grains in 2015, and I haven’t had sugar or grains since then. Now I feel much more energetic and even younger.

Me: Wow. I’m so impressed. Can you share some tips with other western men who are looking to meet Ukrainian mail-order brides?

Brad: Sure. I think western men looking to marry Ukrainian wives would be well-advised to hold themselves accountable by answering the following questions:

  1. How many times do you log in on the Ukrainian dating website each week?
  2. How long do you stay on the Ukrainian women dating site when you are online?
  3. Are you going to Ukraine to meet qualified candidates in person?
  4. Are you on the right international dating sites or the wrong international dating websites?
  5. Are you putting yourself on the line?
  6. Are you talking to single Ukrainian women on the online dating platform?
  7. How often do you send messages to single women on the Internet?
  8. Are you going out of your way when you are talking to women?
  9. Do you tell the Ukrainian lady that you will visit her in person?
  10. Are you keeping the balance in your life?

Me: These ten questions are very powerful and empowering. Thanks for the wisdom and insight. I think when a guy is dating a woman, it’s important to watch what she does, not what she says. A guy must ask himself, “How much does she invest?”

Brad: Indeed. As a responsible guy, I always keep adding value to my wife’s life. That’s the best way to keep my wife.

Me: On a dating website, a guy has got to be thick-skinned and make stuff happen without worrying about it. Don’t let fear of rejection stop you from making progress.

Brad: When a man feels nervous in dating, he should loosen up. Don’t take yourself seriously – that’s my advice.

Me: Thanks for that. The tiny things you do every day will have an impact you can’t believe. The way you communicate with women matters.

Brad: Before a guy goes out with a woman, he should prepare his state by listening to some music and setting priorities – be ready to have nice conversations. Remind yourself that tomorrow exists, too. Even if this date doesn’t work out, you will still meet new people and have new experiences tomorrow.

Me: In order to keep a woman attracted, you must keep your life balanced.

Brad: Exactly. Apart from that, you need to focus on adding value. Again, just bring value to a woman’s life and you will benefit from that in the long term.

Use the push-pull technique to attract a lady.

In sales and marketing, there is a technique called “the push-pull technique”. For example, when you sell a product to a customer, you don’t say “This product is perfect”. Instead, you say, “This product is very good, but it’s not for someone who doesn’t like XYZ.” In other words, you point out the weakness of the product; meanwhile, this weakness doesn’t affect this customer’s life. That’s how you sell this product quickly.

Similarly, in dating and relationships, you can also implement this technique. It’s okay to make the first move and chase a Ukrainian lady at the beginning of the interaction, and then you can allow the lady from Ukraine to re-initiate.

Because Brad V. is a successful man, I also asked for his advice about how to become successful in general. Now I’m happy to share his advice with you.

Me: What’s your No. 1 piece of advice for men who want to be successful?

Brad: Successful people are always running mini-experiments – they take chances; they take calculated risks.

Me: This is great. You never know where opportunities arise.

Brad: Exactly. Don’t burn bridges because those can be future opportunities.

Me: Do you have any advice about networking?

Brad: Yes. You should talk to everyone. Treat people the way they like to be treated.

Me: Some men are in their 20s and are wondering what they should do as they are still looking for their purpose in life. Do you have any suggestions for young men?

Brad: What do you like doing when you were a kid? That’s your true passion. Find something that at least you are interested in. A hobby that you are good at makes money for you.

Me: I think having laser focus is also very important. What do you think?

Brad: Couldn’t agree more. I also focus on my goals. When it comes to my career, I’m selfish – I reject distractions ruthlessly. But I definitely pay attention to my Ukrainian wife after work. I have also noticed that when I say “sorry” less, I become more confident.

Me: Do you have any recommendations for young men who would like to become as interesting as you?

Brad: Don’t be one person. You have to be dynamic. Have multiple personalities, e.g. unique pairings – perhaps you are able to joke with your co-workers during the Happy Hour on Friday afternoon, but you can also be very serious when you are in the office.

Me: Having a range of personas is a good way to become attractive, so a young man should expand his identity/personality. If you want to be more playful, you should be playful now and then people will reflect back to you. People can’t pigeonhole you if you jump outside the box.

“You are going to give out first, and then expect. That’s the principle of reciprocity – you will find the right Ukrainian bride if you have this mindset.”

  • AiJazz

    Totally agree with the Responsible/Successful points. However, I am from India living in Canada and I get a lot of attention here as well.. probably because I find the dream of Ukrainian ladies to find true love absolutely charming. I treat EACH lady as someone completely unique. There is no one size fits all model and there should not be..!!!

    Reply

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