She is Alive

Last week I received a phone call from a very angry man. His voice was raised and he would not let me get a word in edgewise.

I let him say what he had to say and when he finally allowed me to respond to him I found that he was not a user of our site but had just returned from a trip to Ukraine using another sites services where a group of men make the trip to attend a social and meet the local ladies, with the intention of finding someone special.

The trip turned out to be a total waste of time and money. The men and ladies did not know each other, many could hardly communicate and most of the ladies were only there to have a great time at the mans expense.

It was obvious to the man that this was an arrangement between the tour operator and a local agency as a money making venture, so he proceeded to get some details including a few of the ladies names and photos and the agency concerned.

He was calling me to say how angry he was with the industry and that if I had dealings with this agency and their ladies I had better do something about it urgently. He also asked if I had anything to do with the tour operator.

When I advised him that we had long past recognised the agency as a scammer and stopped working with them and that he could see the same agency manager and ladies listed on our scammer profiles he was taken aback. When I also said that we do not take tours where ladies and men are unknown to each other because the chances of success are almost nil he went silent.

He did not realise that there is a legitimate site out there that does something about these situations.

I used his silence to get across my disappointment that he had made the trip to find his love without even knowing any of the ladies. No wonder he came back alone and disenchanted.

Unfortunately there are some misconceptions about a ladies life in Ukraine and some sites and agencies exploit this to make money.

There are misconceptions that most ladies live a miserable existence in Ukraine and long for a life in a foreign country. Any foreign man that appears that has enough money to escort her out of the country can do it at will. This could not be further from the truth.

Ukraine is a beautiful country that has its problems – as all countries do. The ladies enjoy their families and friends, they are patriotic and they live and work happily. There are greater opportunities for career advancement and fulfilling life’s potential in foreign countries and many Ukraine ladies look for this. If it happens, then great.

However, even if they do find a foreign country to settle in, they will not lose their Ukraine heritage, they will still contact family and friends, they will remain patriotic and they will want to visit home often.

Too many men believe the misconceptions that Ukraine ladies are sitting on a shelf waiting for the first foreign man to come and whisk them off to a new life. Many men also wonder why the lady is still not available on the site when he has not written to her for months and wants to resume correspondence.

Hello!!!! These ladies live, breath and grow. They are real and they enjoy life. Don’t expect them to be waiting for you to change their life for your convenience – it does not happen like that. They look for an opportunity to improve their life and hope that love will make that a possibility, but they do not need rescuing.

I think I was the one doing the shouting at the end of the call.

Nadezhda K

Nadezhda is a romantic who enjoys writing poetry and painting. She loves travelling and experiencing different cultures. In her free time, she volunteers at local shelters, practices yoga, and loves quiet moments with a good book and a cup of herbal tea.