I received an email from a member last week. They believed it would be fairer if the ladies paid to register on this Ukrainian marriage site.
He believed that by allowing ladies to join for free, we were encouraging scammers onto the site. He added that if we made them pay to join, they would not.
I receive a similar email about every six months and I have never been convinced that this is correct.
Most women who join the site simply can’t afford to pay to join. That is one of the main reasons they register on marriage sites to find love and relocate to another country.
The management of this marriage site and I believe that no registration fee will scare scammers. Scammers will willingly pay whatever fee they are charged and perhaps will work harder to scam and recover their money.
Making ladies pay to use the site will not deter scammers from this legitimate marriage site.
However, every genuine lady that can not afford to pay a fee and therefore does not join the site makes it easier for scammers to achieve success – simply there will be fewer ladies to choose from.
Maybe I am wrong but I can’t follow his logic. Even if we charge ladies a token of $1 a month to register, what difference would it make to either a genuine lady or a scammer?
The only way to deter scammers from joining the site is to stringently vet all ladies when they register, continually follow up to ensure they are still actively using the site and that their details have not changed, refund men for any signs of insincerity and fine the ladies and agencies every time there is a problem.
That is what we do – and it works.
To those who are serious about diving into their international dating and marriage journey, welcome aboard! Thank you for registering with Ukraine Brides Agency. Stay tuned for our insightful dating advice and stop by our success stories to inspire yourself. True love is coming your way soon, don’t doubt it.
Nadezhda is a romantic who enjoys writing poetry and painting. She loves travelling and experiencing different cultures. In her free time, she volunteers at local shelters, practices yoga, and loves quiet moments with a good book and a cup of herbal tea.
Hi Keith!
I read your Blog comments regarding member inquiries that your women pay a fee to join your site. You well know I disagree with the logic you put forth that a woman paying makes no difference. Where your logic fails is that apparently it does MATTER to your PAYING clients who spend quite a sum of money to contact your ladies and there is NO equitable balance. Men are just seeking the semblance of equality and that anything FREE is always a magnet for those who will abuse. A woman who cannot afford $1 to join a site, I would question what are her real motives that finding a husband legitimately is not worth a $1 investment? Sorry Keith, Ukraine women do have $1 to spend and I think that is what men on your site would find curious why they would not if they are indeed serious to find love. It really is just the principle, not the money. That is where we fail to agree and as a man with 17 years experience and International Expert/book author, a paying client and a one scammed many times, I have much MORE knowledge about this than you. I even shared much of that knowledge as you developed your site, less you forget.
Men are your paying clients and they always MATTER! And maybe if you just tried, there would be a different perception.
I can hope you do not block this, but I fear you will. I know you do not like any negative comments about your site which lends to total censorship and biased commentary just to make you look good. Honest sites can take constructive, opposite views without fear!
Hi Reggie
Thanks for your post.
My email was regarding whether a scammer would be deterred from using the site if she had to pay – it was not whether ladies should pay to use the site. That is another matter
The man who emailed me suggested that scammers would not use the site if they had to pay. I disagree – it will not stop scammers.
If I made them pay $1 they will still join – as will all other genuine ladies
If I make them pay $100 each month, the scammers will still pay but most genuine women could not.
The discussion on whether women should pay to join the site – just to help balance the perceived fairness by men, is another matter.
It would be interesting to read other members views on this subject.
My own view is that if a woman pays a small amount it is only token. If I make her pay a large amount to make it seem fairer, I will price the opportunity too high for the majority of Ukraine women where the average salary is $200 per month
But I could be wrong…..
Keith,
the salaries of women are dropping to as low as $50 a month I have heard from my lady friends. They are afraid for their family and their country. I don’t agree with you a 100% on some things but I think you do a great job over all. I sometimes communicate with ladies not even because I think we are a match per se but I like to hear their experiences and opinions of both the site and men they meet. I don’t detect any scammers at all. Thanks for a job well done.
hi Keith –
Personally I do not think the ladies should pay. Financially it is very difficult for them.
I don’t agree with the argument that if they pay it will reduce scamming. From my experience, the scam starts with the agency and continues with the ladies.
If a lady is a scammer, either she is getting paid by the agency, or she will ask for money from the man. Men should never send money and if you trust the agency, then that solves both scenarios. UBA screens the ladies. It might be interesting for some to know a little about the screening process to help men gain some trust of UBA. But, Keith and the UBA staff are always available for questions.
That said, it would be good to have some guidelines for the ladies. Write long letters. Show interest by asking questions. Create a complete profile. Be willing to share contact information after a couple months so you can chat more often. I think Keith has tried some of these, but others I think can help.
jim
Hi Jim
Thank you again for your comments.
We are always trying to keep the site as accurate as we can and you will see BIG changes in the next few months.
Regarding sharing contact information, that is strictly monitored by US Law (IMBRA) where it is illegal to share contact details without completing necessary paperwork by both men and women.
In fact our offices were audited by the US Embassy in Kiev a few weeks ago and we were congratulated on our IMBRA systems.
This only applied to US citizens, of course
Hi Jim:
May I ask how experienced are you with online dating and how many different websites you used prior to UBA? Well, I have over 17 years, consulting with men and marriage agencies including UBA, and married 6 years to a Belarusian woman (divorce due to her infidelity). I am a book author on the subject as well! How many women have you met and countries visited and how many SCAMMERS have you met online or in person? I have personally reported over 1100 SCAMMERS with evidence over my years, so I think that makes me quite bit more an expert on the matter than you. Am I wrong?
I talk with many men who would disagree with you just on the merit. Women have nothing vested, so why should they care? I know a matchmaker who is paid HUNDREDS of dollars by women to help them find a husband, so it is ludicrous supposition that a woman can ill afford a few dollars just to show a vested interest in her search. NO, that does not eliminate scammers but it severely reduces them for sure. Scammers go after the easy money and ANYTHING you can do to eliminate is always helpful. Sadly, scammers will always be a part of online dating and that then falls on UBA to do their due diligence to ensure none get through, and to be held accountable when they do not. YES, the screening process should be thorough; Personal interview, passport review, BACKGROUND CHECK, telephone verification by agencies should be required by UBA then followed by their own spot checking and verification. The question is how much of that is actually done. UBA relies on agencies, so it behooves them to align only with vetted, well respected agencies and forget the rest.
Women who are serious (as you are) can afford a few dollars if that is their sincere goal, that is the point I make, nothing more. It adds more balance to the whole scheme of things and then both man and woman are vested.
Hi Jim and Reggie
Unfortunately Reggie is correct when he says scammers will always be part of online dating and this is especially true for Ukraine and Russia where it has been allowed to develop over many years – much longer than we have been in existence. We still find that the majority of agencies – and there are thousands of them, accept it as part of normal business practice.
We have learned much over the years and have tightened controls considerably in that time. We have learned the hard way in many cases and we have been offered advice by men such as Reggie who have experienced it and have passed on advice. Reggie has given advice that we have taken up, we have discovered ourselves certain signs and pitfalls and we will have lost many good members over the years as we pulled the wool back from over our eyes.
We are very strict with any new agency that approaches us and we reject 75% of them without even trialling them. We also constantly monitor agencies and ladies, even those that have been with us for many years to ensure that they are still working genuinely and accurately. Many agencies just give up with us as they cant understand why we are always checking them – and often fining them for any number of reasons. We dont rely on agency vetting – at all. If the agency is a scam agency, then their vetting is zero.
We offer refunds to men who prove to us that they have been scammed – and it is not hard to prove scamming. There is another side to the story regarding dishonest and unscrupulous men who prey on the ladies, but that is a story for another time.
Our vetting of agencies includes:
Ensuring they have 5 years experience
Proven successful marriages
Where they advertise for ladies and how their ads are worded
Do they have their own website – and what does it say
What office facilities they have including computers and translators
What other sites are they listed on
References from men and ladies
A signed agreement including rewards, fines and standards.
Our vetting of ladies (and we vet EVERY lady) includes:
Copies of her passport pages
Her divorce paperwork
Her email address and phone number
Their social network pages
We call each lady and interview with her to ensure she is genuinely listed on the site and we ask her to verify her contact details, passport details and place of birth.
When the agency is working with us and we have their ladies listed we continue proactive vetting including:
Calling the ladies and rechecking their contact details, asking her if she is still active on the site and the usernames of any men she is corresponding with
Requesting video chats with online ladies to ensure they accept and go into video chat with us
Monitoring each lady to see how often she is online, how many men she is communicating with and how many letters she is sending out
Keeping a register of complaints to identify trends and patterns
We pay the agencies near the end of the following month so that they know we will withhold the previous months commissions if they carry out any dishonest activity.
As a site administrator, when I look at a lady’s profile on our site, I see triple the information that a member can see – all part of the vetting process.
The vetting process is continually updated as we find better ways of ensuring that we offer a genuine service.
We know we have made huge steps over the years to tidy up the processes and offer a genuine service – and, as Reggie says, we need to stay proactive as scamming will always be part of online dating.
hi Reggie –
Wow, it seems like this post really hit a button with you.
I find it interesting you want to know my experience in online dating. My hunch is if I would tell you that I have 18 years experience (more than you), you would not believe me. But, I will be honest, I have not written any books about online dating. Nor do I have over 17 years experience. I would like to congratulate you on such an accomplishment.
Personally, I think a person’s years of experience is only 1 of many factors in determining credibility. What about a person’s Intelligent quotient? Do you want to compare our IQs? Obviously I am joking, but I hope you understand that the best way to communicate a difference is not really to attack someone else’s experience. Actually, I think it wreaks of immaturity.
For me, I look for an intelligent argument when discussing differences. I am a technology professional and have created training content (books and videos) that have been used by some of the technology giants here in the USA. Does that make me more knowledgeable? I do not think so. Writing a book takes dedication, but it does not mean you are an expert in some area. I am sure you will disagree with that.
Funny thing is, I actually think we agree, to an extent. I do believe the ladies need some responsibility, but I just do not think that has to be a financial responsibility. As I stated, writing long letters, be willing to share contact information and make the effort to chat. I have completed the IMBRA forms, but not one lady has wanted to share her information with me. One lady even told me it is easier using UBA chat. That was an issue for me. If you want me to spend my money and use my time to go half way across the world to meet you, you should be willing to do some work as well. Relationships require work and are not always easy.
I do believe the ladies should be vested in their search. But, why do you believe that has to be financially? As you implied, these ladies should be able to spend $1 a month. They probably could. But, given this low number, how vested are they then? At some point, the dollar amount needs to be high enough to actually mean something, but at that price point, other ladies might not be able to afford it and thus will not be able to use the site, as Keith pointed out.
I just think there are other ways to ensure integrity of the ladies and agency. UBA does screen the ladies. Is this bullet proof? No, but I think it is more than most. And as I stated, sharing some of the screening process will help build credibility.
Reggie, feel free to pass along some of the titles of the books you wrote. I really need some more kindling.
Jim
Thanks Jim
If you look at the comments you will see I have outlined the vetting processes
Best wishes
Keith
Keith,
One suggestion I have is many of the ladies have expressed surprise at the cost of chat and video chat to me. They said they did not know we even had to pay for it. Maybe this is just not paying attention on their part but if true you might make them aware of it. If they watch TV take a phone call or make tea during a chat when aware of the cost then I would cross them off my list of interest. I tell them I am willing to spend money but I am not willing to waste money.
Jordan
Thank you for your comments Jordan. I am pleased that you are satisfied with us – and there will always be things that we dont agree upon.
Your comment about ladies not knowing the cost of chats is good on one hand – if they thought it was free for men then they are not involved in collusion that ladies are often accused of.
However, as you point out, if they thought it was free then they dont realise how expensive it can be to time waste – such as making a cup of tea.
We are just about to start training seminars with both agencies and ladies about how they can do things better and understand what appears to men to be callous, or profiteering. Often, these things are done quite naively and innocently, but men who have been scammed elsewhere immediately see these things as dishonest.
We will add chat etiquette and consideration to the training.
Thank you
Hi Jim!
Thanks for the dialogue, it is always great! When someone questions me or my opinion as you did, I will always answer. Yes, you did hit a button with me when it comes to the corruption of online dating. It is a heated passion of mine to eradicate such corruption and help educate men so they do NOT fall into the same traps as I did along the way. My question of your online experience was to determine how knowledgeable you really are and if you faced similar episodes as I did in my journeys. That is all and NOTHING more. But it was not any attack on you at all! Yes, I will find irritating any man who has not “walked in my shoes” and then may act as he has. I admit it can be a flaw and certainly I am not all knowing. I am more knowing than the majority of men online simply because I lived it. I do not wish any man to suffer the heartbreak, emotional drain and financial drain I did trying to find a bride. On Keith’s site alone in over 2 years of trying, I spent close to $10,000. Women came and went, many in beginning (until I helped Keith clean it up) did prove not “marriage-oriented” and the main reason I still remain alone is NOT for the sake of trying, but for the lack of finding sincere and honest women with my same goal of sincerity and effort to even have a chance finding a real dialogue leading to love and marriage. UBA does give you more a chance, but it does not make their site perfect and even Keith will admit that. I have always endorsed his site even when we have disagreed.
My style of writing here is not pleasant for most because of the passion within to tell the world to watch out. I am sorry to rub you the wrong way as that was never my intent. I am NOT attacking anyone, you or Keith. I asked you questions is all, that you take such as an attack, gives me pause for curiosity as well. I disagree on some issues and that is our right. If I shared my personal journey with you then I think you would speak a different tune. If you think I wreak of immaturity then you did not get at all what I was trying to say. I have many men who agree with me, but always there will be different views on the subject based on one’s own personal journey.
Now who has button hit to question my IQ Jim? Should I say you also wreak of immaturity to throw that in my face? Just making a point is all, I care less about it. I think it is above 129 which I think is a normal score? NO, I am not some genius and if you have higher, ok and kudos for you! It does not say that you experienced all I have. I do not know and why I simply asked. Maybe you have, so please tell us. If I shared my personal journey with you then I think you would speak a different tune. I have had my fair share of SCAMMERS online, having personally exposed over 1100 women in my years. I have seen every possible scam variation there is and have a 95+% accuracy rate in spotting a scammer. Sure I can agree just because I wrote a book alone does not make me an expert. What does is my years of personal on-hand experiences, thousands of letters, travel to 7 countries and meeting women you come to realize are nothing as they claim to be (a rare few I became great friends with until this day, one even a former fiancée), and just LIVING the EXPERIENCE. Few men can say the same. And I am one who is willing to expose my own personal side to people such as you, often mocked and ridiculed for just speaking out, but always gratified for the men who did listen and were saved. And there have been many to make what I do worthwhile Jim.
The ONLY point I was making was that if a woman showed her sincerity by making some “investment” to her search as men are ALWAYS required to do, men may find it more agreeable and that maybe she does have more sincerity than say a woman who just looks to get everything free. I did not say it prevents scammers, that is the agency and UBA’s job to do and to be accountable when they fail as Keith has professionally outlined in his following comments. He tries and does a better job than most and I consider him an honest man overall. And women could pay $1 or $5 if they felt that serious and why should they not? It at least makes you feel they have some skin in the game like you or me. I only throw such figure for the sake of a figure, that is all. Something they can afford given their circumstances to be fair. It is more the principle of it all, as I said, than anything else. A very simple concept thrown so way out of context when people decide to see it one when in actuality it is another! But heh, that is what makes us all different!
Your point about their “time” investment is very true and I am glad to see you get that part! I hope the members will read that part and let it sink in! They deserve no less!
My book Trials & Tribulations of an Internet Dater can be found on Amazon.com . It is more an information guidebook and not any literary masterpiece. My second and more detailed book, co-authored with an experienced matchmaker and Ukrainian blogger will be out early next year and hopefully, a Hollywood movie version based on my journey, an eye opener for all regarding the online dating industry later in the year. But it’s a romance comedy! LOL
I welcome your personal solicitation to me, just ask Keith for my email as I do not think I can give it out here and we can have intriguing discussion in hopes to clear the air here! OK?
regards all,
Reggie
Hi Reggie
Thank you for your comments.
As you know we tried many times over the two years that you used our services to assist you and advise you on your search. We offered you our matchmaking services and we gave you advice that we thought would assist you. However you chose to ignore everything that we suggested on the basis that we did things wrong – not the same as you would do.
You reminded us many times that you have been looking for many years, have written a book (and soon a second book), have contacts in Ukraine and that you know how it should be done. If we were following your formula, then you would have found success with us.
We set up the site how we believe it should be done – and we made some mistakes (and yes you offered advice that helped, as did many other users of our site). We dont want to replicate all the other sites out there – that is why we set up in the first place – to offer an alternative.
You are looking to set up your own site also – and you will do it exactly as you wish. I wish you all the success. But I will not criticise you or your methods, I will carry on doing what I believe is best and right.
We all have our opinions and this blog is happy to share those opinions. In fact we may be one of the only sites that has a blog that is as open as this connected to the main site.
However, an opinion is just that – an opinion. There should never be any personal attacks in comments.
We have achieved much success with men and ladies who have used the site for only a short time – they have used the site as it has been set up, not tried to bypass the systems, they have looked at a sensible partner profile and they have not cast the net wide. In our reference section you will see Kelly and Rick who achieved very quick success with little outlay. That makes everything worth the effort for us – and we celebrate with them.
I always say to men “what were you looking for before you registered? That is what you should continue to look for after you register.”The moment you are distracted by a profile that was outside your original criteria, you are likely to fail.
There are a number of comments coming through the blog section now (and we will be proactively requesting more contributions) and most of them are positive and most of them have a lesson learned somewhere in the journey.
A marriage service between men and women, Ukraine and foreign, in an industry that has been rife with scamming for years, is not an easy task – and there is no guaranteed success. The women on the site also have a say on whether a relationship will develop – they have feelings and a soul as well. Too many men join thinking that they are buying from a catalogue.
Our staff are sometimes afraid to open an email or answer a call because of the man that is calling – he is so rude and obnoxious that the staff ask if I will answer him rather then them. These men treat the ladies on the site the same and then call us scammers because they cant achieve success. There are many such men using marriage sites.
Unfortunately, I am unable to put across our side of this story – too often it is a one-sided commentary. But that will not stop us trying to help and to be the best.
hi Reggie –
Thank you for your thoughts. As for the request of a personal solicitation, I respectfully decline.
Best of luck to you.
Jim
an email from Rodriguez of Netherlands:
Hi Dear My name is Rodriguez from Netherlands i just register in your site, in my opinion the ladies shouldn’t pay to register could be really difficult for many of them to find they love, i love very much and i respect Ukraine woman the are one of the best in the world , i had also problem before in others site with scammers fake profile asking for money, so i learning my lesson. I suggest each lady should have a video of her not only pictures,this could get away the scammers out the site, because once we serious man knows, that really lady have also videos in her profile, we will never deal with scammers, myself mostly i prefer to connect with a lady who has videos in her profile,that show she is real. Rodriguz
email from Kent, San Diego
Very interesting. I agree with you that ladies should not be charged. Ok so there are a few ladies that slip through the cracks and are scammers. A man with any intelligence can figure this out. I have been at this for years. I have found some very genuine ladies on your site. More then any other site. In fact I may have found my beloved here. If you charge woman to go on this site it may exclude many beautiful genuine woman because they simply can’t afford it.
Men need to understand that if they use common sense they will be fine. If a lady is truly interested she will answer all of your questions in detail as well as ask you questions. This dialogue will continue and grow, If not simply move on. Even on your site unfortunately even on this site I did communicate with 2 ladies that were on Elite Sites. There letters were nonsense and jibberish. There was no meaning and they just went on and on about nothing at all. Never commented on my letters or asked any questions. Were they scammers? I don’t know I never let it get any farther then a few letters. Did I lose a few dollars? Yes…But I simply moved on. You have to keep moving until you find the right lady.
Bottom line is never give any money and if they are talking about nothing then move on.
Kent
an email from Dann in Australia
By not making the ladies pay you are paving a clear path for scammers to scam even easier than ever before.. Most scammers (not all) scam due to their own financial hardships so I believe making ladies pay is fair, if a man has to pay then so should the woman.. You say the ladies simply cannot afford to pay and I understand this but not all men can afford your prices either (me for one, and this is why I have not visited your site since registration knowing I’m probably breaking hearts by doing so).. I believe love is something “given for free” to the one you desire (a husband does not HAVE to pay rent to his wife for the love and affections she willingly “gives” him) I do not have to pay “fees” to find a girl in a bar or shoping center and I believe finding live and happiness shouldnt cost you anything at all.. ever.. If a man pays for love and affections isnt this akin to prostitution??? To finish my letter to you, if a man has to pay to find love and happiness on your site the so should the woman.. IT’S CALLED EQUALITY….
Hi Keith and others, I have read the comments above with interest.
There will always be dishonest people where ever there is easy money to be found.
I personally don’t think making the ladies pay would deter any scammers, it would only affect the genuine woman that cannot afford even a modest amount.
The vetting process that you are using may not be perfect but if followed correctly at least it makes sure that the lady actually exists.
From my experience the Ukrainian women expect any interested men to pay for everything while on a date, it may be an old fashioned concept and I would suggest that if you are not prepared to go along with such a tradition then you should not be looking in this part of the world.
If you are worried about a few dollars now how are you going to react when you get to the Ukraine after paying thousands for airfares, accommodation, meals, translators etc etc
Keith and his team are doing the best that they can, but you can never keep everyone happy 100% of the time.
Cheers John.
Thanks John
Your comments are very thoughtful and positive
Keith
Hi Keith and Guys
I have not written a book, i do not teach technology or present training seminars. I am a fat 40 year old who went on this site with a lot of other looking for someone. I spent 3 months on this site and went to Ukraine to see for myself what the women really are like and also to consider if i was getting scammed.
I can now tell you from personal experience that my Sveta does not get a large amount. She works for a retail outlet in a department store and works weekends. She gets around 1300 UAH a week from which she has to pay for her rent, her childs kindergarten classes, food etc.
She might get to have a night out with her friends once a month and she does all this by living with her parents in a two bedroom flat.
I for one would hate to see the girls pay to use the site for Sveta could simply not afford to pay. A lot of women are also in similar situations.
Here is a good clue to avoid scammers, go and see for yourself. The trip is really only the start of the journey. If you can talk to your girl at all hours and she tells you she works, when does she sleep. ask her simple facts that can be checked easily, eg the weather. Do not send any money. Really the only way you can get scammed is if you want to be scammed. Do not send money = no scam. If you find a lady is just seeing what she can get from you through this website,tell keith and get your money back. I really do not know what more UBA can do. Keith please do not make the ladies pay. I would hate for any one else to miss out on what i have been so very lucky to find because the ladies simply can not afford to pay.
Thanks Kelly
Totally agree.
jim
Would have to agree with Kelly, if you want to be certain get off your butt and take a trip to the Ukraine and see for yourself. No amount of talking and over thinking will be a substitute for first hand experience. I was lucky enough to find someone first time and will be going back in a few months to see what the future holds for us both.
Email from James, London
HI keith ,how are you ?
I had to reply to your letter regarding,women paying to join the site.
I think you are 100% right .what is wrong with these men,?
They obviasly dont understand the way many of these women live
Having been scammed many times ,I understand that genuine women
Struggle to live ,let alone pay for a dating site
Well done Kieth ,hope you continue to make your site as genuine as possible
Many thanks James
Hi Keith:
Thank you for your comments to my reply to Jim. First off, in NO WAY was I attacking anyone, I was sharing my opinion of things as an actual online dater, a PAYING client, and one who has experienced perhaps more online than anyone here. We all have our viewpoints and I respect the right to have them.
Why I had no success on your site was COMPLETELY OPPOSITE of what you claim in your commentary Keith. YOU offered me services WHICH DID NOT WORK! Your matchmaking was nothing more than an introduction to women YOU felt I should meet and NOT based on any of the details, information or requirements I gave to you to follow.
Remember Olga from Nikolaev? I spent 6 months developing relations, ready to go meet her and then come to find the agency had been playing both you and I all along? YOU blame me for that? Others ended up proving they had no real intentions to know me and sorry I will not be blamed for that either Keith. The list goes on.
What you suggest is that I have no clue what I am doing and the reason for not finding anyone. Every man’s situation is different than any other and sorry Keith, I am not one just to settle for what I can get when I know what I want and need. No man should! My complaint to you is that you have NEVER used online dating and thereby have NO CLUE what any man undergoes in a search, you operate and run a website. It’s business for you.
Yes, you are one of the few agencies I would ever tell any man I know to use, for I consider you honest and fair for the most part, but had you instituted many of the ideas I gave you 2 years ago (and oddly now have adopted many similar ideas lately) maybe I would not still be searching.
We just disagree on many things from an operational and customer service level, and that is ok. Yes, I will do things very different on my future website.
But please NEVER insult me to say that basically I am a loser for not following your way of doing things when the majority of the time it is the women who are the problem and NOT me! Thank you for all the good work you do and for the success any man may find on your site.
And for any of you out there, YES, perhaps I have found someone using the sound logic I follow of HOW a woman should relate to a man online, develop relations and prepare for a meeting which I hope will happen to soon. And she is exactly what I have tried to find online all these years!!!
HI reggie
i have just read your comments and maybe it is the way it is written but it seems as though you expect the woman you find to act in a certain way, to conform to your ideas of what a woman should be. and how they should behave and act towards you. It seems all about you. I ask what about the woman, does she get to act and behave how she wants. Do you expect her to be submissive and obedient? I do not know if this is what you are searching for or not just the way your post reads and i mean no offence. No self respecting woman would put up with that sort of attitude and if they did they are only after your money.
I get told off every day from sveta when i say something stupid. Today for example as we were discussing visas, i told her for me to be skinnny it will take 12 months because to the weight i have to lose. I asked if she was ready to come to australia before i am skinny to see what she thinks and also to see if we can live together. She said yes but if when she comes i stop trying to lose weight she will go back to ukraine. Now that is what i call honesty. She wants me to be healthy, nothing more.
I think the fact that keith published your post speaks of the honesty and integrity of this man and of his website. I for one do not think you are a loser and i did not read keith saying that in his post. I think what you are searching for in a woman will be difficult to find in Ukraine or any eastern European nation these days.
I was surprised and happy to read that you have found someone and i hope it works out for you, i really do. I however find your post concerning as you seem to want a submissive woman and i am not sure of any woman in our modern world who would tolerate such an attitude these days.
I really do wish you well in your search
hi Kelly –
Keep fighting the good fight. From a health perspective, you need to lose the weight. Am praying for you…
jim
Hi JIm
thanks for your kind words. I am losing this weight primarily for health reasons which is really why Sveta wants me to lose it. She wants me for life and not just for a residency))). I pray also for you and your search. Feel free to email keith for my contact details if you want to talk offsite. Cheers
kelly
Hi keith,
I think it will be much easier for a man to find a genuine woman if there are some charges to female members. The ladies we need here are genuine and who are willing to marry a foreigner, not those who is playing around or just being nosy.
Harry
I believe Keith’s vetting process is sincere enough. I believe the women registering on Keith’s site are actualy here to find a serious relationship. And I don’t believe payment for ladies will make any difference. situation in Ukrain is bad enough as it is, been there two times and I say no to ladies payment. Ladies with high education profiles might afford this but ladies with lower profiles and with child simply can’t and they deserve equal chances. This site has a set up that protects men in a high degree but should protect her ladies equally, and I believe UBA has a fair balance in considering the possibilities between the financial possibilities between the east and the west. And although I find the rates for chat and video chat too high, I respect this. Keith also has to pay the salaries of the staff. Ukrain women can’t, we can. Period. And for this reason this site keeps excistance. I have been in cantact with a lady for months and if she is interested than she will try to invest whatever she can in you. But you are not shopping for a partner so don’t approach UBA as a shopping site with money back garantue. You are dating, just as you would with domestic women. And with the distance, yes, it will cost you, with no garantues. Sometimes it matches, sometimes it doesn’t. It’s your own attitude that will make a difference, not making the ladies write long letters or pay fees. If they are interested then you will get all attention. Leave them be and just let things happen. If it’s there, it will. If not, deal with it and move on. My lady her english is bad and I can’t pay for daily videochats, so I am sending her to a private tutor and financial supporting it, she can’t, I can. with a risk. This gesture meant the world to her, with succes? not garantued. But we can talk in skype now and further our relationship being financial bearable for me. Don’t force them, I believe in the vetting and UBA does it’s best for all of you guys and for it’s ladies. Whatever happens next can’t be controlled. Or get a Fillipino mail order bride…
HI Keith
Scammers are fickle. They are not locked onto a single site. If they are here, they are also elsewhere. I’ve used this site and others, but I have not found any scammers here at UKB. I’ve found a useful defence, and have used it here and on other sites, so I’d like to pass it on. I do this as soon as I meet lady online. Open a photo of the lady you are talking to, and right click on the photo. From the menu, select ‘Search Google for this image’. If there is more than one instance of the photo you searched for, you can see where it is, and what name the photo is exhibited under. I found one lady I had just begun talking with, at another site, was also listed with 14 other sites, with 14 different names, as well as with four model agencies, and under five names at VZ, the Russian Facebook. I broke the contact immediately. Yes there is some chance I was talking to the real lady, and her contact details had been hijacked, but why risk it? This is a simple but effective check anyone can do in seconds, and if you find something suspicious, move on immediately. Good site you’ve got Keith 😉
Thank you Glenn
Always pleased to receive comments and tips.
It is often fine for ladies to be listed at a number of sites. The ladies agency will do this to give her profile wider coverage and give her a greater chance of success.
However – her profile should always be identical – name, age, occupation, city, etc. If there is a discrepancy then her photo may have been stolen by another site and used to lure you in.
If you are in doubt about any of our ladies, please contact us. We vet every lady so we have her passport details, social network pages, her phone number and email address and we have checked them prior to allowing her to register.
However, it is always best to check if you have any dounts
Keith
I’ve read the comments and I think ladies not paying is the better option.
As far as scamming is concerned.
I actually think one of the areas of scamming that is not talked about much is what does the agency do with there payments and are they paying their ladies directly themselves.
I started this process through a good friend’s brother who met a lady and married off another site. His own wife said she was aware of several ladies who were paid by a different agency then she worked with and those ladies would get a commission based on any revenue she obtained. These ladies had no problem being on camera and actually preferred it as it earned them a greater commission. They knew who they talked too on the site and so when the sites would vet her she could say she spoke to “Mark” on the appropriate date and time. In short both of these ladies jobs was basically a “paid communicator”.
It is often my concern that this is where the slippage occurs, because it seems that the agency is vetted by the site and the agency can vet the lady but the site cannot control what the agency and the lady do directly as they can’t control the flow of funds once the agency receives it and outside sites control such as UBA.
Maybe Keith and his group have ways to check this, but I just don’t see how in his investigations can uncover when the lady is being paid under the table
I know this blog is about ladies paying but in my estimation I think that will cause more harm then good.
Better focus is focusing on the agencies and the ladies who are registered then making them pay.
Just my thoughts
Hi Mark
Thank you for your comments. Yes, this is an area of concern and we have found a few agencies over the years that have been doing this.
You are correct – we do a considerable amount of vetting on each agency and lady and what it shows is that the lady exits and is genuinely using the site – we have her details, she appears in chats, she knows who she is talking to etc. What it will not show is who is being paid to communicate.
However – we do vet this also! Unless a lady or translator informs us directly, we find out through experience – and we refund men retrospectively.
It becomes obvious to a man after a while, that the lady just does not seem 100% interested or encourages never-ending communication – and he complains to us and we investigate. We can determine this easily using a number of methods.
It can also be a series of complaints that build up against separate women, but the same agency – a pattern emerges around that agency.
In each case we refund men. It is unfortunate that it cant be determined before the man has wasted his time – but at least he has not wasted his money.
These agencies leave us quickly – or we deactivate and expose them. Perhaps you have seen agencies disappear from our site over the time that you have been registered with us?
It can be a problem – but can also be addressed if they are exposed and the man is refunded.
Thanks for your comments Mark
Keith
Hi keith
my sveta was listed on over 23 sites. I here what glen is saying, different sites, different names, run and also tell keith. being on many sites does not make her not genuine, just like i was on a lot of sites searching, so do the agencies. thank god they did and i found my sveta here. If i found here on another site i would have gone broke paying for letters and video chats)))
Hi Kelly
I haven’t found any non-genuine ladies at UBA. I have found them on other sites. If there is a discrepancy in the name, beware. I found one lady listed under seven different names, and seven different heights! I’ve heard of an assumed name, but never an assumed height! I also found a listing for her at VZ, the Russian Facebook. As I speak fluent Russian I contacted her and asked about all the listings. She was an actress and had listed with an introduction agency five years earlier, but had long since married and left. Her photos were still circulating, under different names, and heights, five years later. I gave her the list of places where she was listed, and within days, those profiles disappeared. She wanted to introduce me to her cousin, who, she assured me, had one name and a constant altitude.
Profiles do get stolen, and perhaps sold. I have found photos that have been hijacked from modelling agency catalogs, and identities lifted from VZ and other Russian social media sites. The image search is not foolproof, but it can give you a whiff if there is something smelly about the lady you are talking to.
Another quick sniff can be approach the lady in her native tongue. This is easier for me if I am speaking with a Ukrainian or Russian lady as I have the lingo, but I went onto another site, that exhibited some highly questionable profiles, and approached a lady who was supposed to be Ukrainian. I approached her in Russian. She said could I please speak English as she speaks English. This was said in very poor English, so I wrote again in Russian. I received a reply in very poor Russian. I wrote again in Russian and watched for the chat box message ‘xxx is typing’ to indicate a message was being entered directly into the chat window. After a considerable wait, a message in quite poor Russian came up, but I knew, as there was no message about ‘xxx is typing’ that xxx was actually using a translator program, and cut/pasting the translation. I did the same thing with a supposed Turkish woman, as I also speak reasonable Turkish.
However, it doesn’t matter if you cannot speak her native tongue, you can use a translator program. Open two translator windows so you can check your own post and make sure it’s accurate before you transmit. Some programs do the back translation automatically to save you this step.
I think the old adage ‘if it sounds to good to be true it probably isn’t’ is a sound one if you are spending any time (and money) on dating sites. Another piece of advice I’d give, is to avoid sites that do not offer live video connections where you can see the lady live while you chat. I’m sure some chats I’ve had were with ‘boiler room’ workers posing as ladies, probably in Nigeria.
One final check you can make, if you are really suspicious, is to tell the lady you are in town and want to meet immediately. If it’s a scammer they will make excuses, usually that they are away in another town.
Good luck everyone. I hope I have been of some help in not having you and your hard earned parting company.
Privet Glen
That is great advice. it really is a shame that we have to do all these checks because of some scammers, who really make it hard for the genuine woman and sites. ochin spasibo)))
Hi
Of course ladies mustn’t pay to register , actually it will not make the website awesome any more as some ladies will see it as money sucker who wanna money for every single thing even for registration . Every lady has the freedom to register without paying, and if payment is gonna be a rule okay make it for men too so there is an equality .
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