Statistics to Success

May 7, 2015 at 1.00am by in Online Dating

Last week an agency spoke with me about the problem the ladies have contacting men who have the wrong settings in their profile. The men have not given too much thought to their personal settings and they have blocked out a proportion of ladies that they may have success forming a relationship with.

Too often men fill in their profiles as quickly as they can so that they can use the site and start searching for their true love. They may not realise that the settings that we allow men to set actually limits the ladies that can contact him.

Statistics on our site show that the majority of successful relationships that have developed on our site have been with ladies aged 35 years and older. Yet, when many men set up their profile on the site they quickly put an age range of 20 – 30 or 25 – 34 and never go back to review this decision.

Statistically, your chances of success are much greater if you raise the age range and include ladies up to your own age, or close to. Leaving a large age range gap, or setting a range that stops too young may limit your chances of success.

Please take a moment to look at the settings and limits that you have set in your personal profile. You can change this at any time – you are in control.

Similarly, you can set limits on the nudges and messages that you receive and the requests for chats. If you have set no limits, or shut down all communication avenues, you will not receive the information that is right for you.

There are also many men who dont post their own photos on the site yet only ladies that are registered on the site can see these photos. I can tell you that no lady will write to a man who does not have a photo posted. She wants to know what you look like – just like you would not write to a lady who has no photo posted.

Finally, if you are considering visiting your lady, please use the video chat facilities on the site first. It is essential that you talk and can see each other as it provides so much of the unwritten characteristics of the other person. Letters and text chats are great – to a point. When that point starts to get serious, you need to video chat.

Our success is measured by your success – that is the key performance indicator that we place at the top of our goals.

Have a look at your own settings today and change them to improve your success. What do you have to lose?

Last week, Jeremy Little, Immigrant VISA Chief from the US Embassy in Kiev visited our offices and spoke with all our staff about the IMBRA Law requirements and the K1 VISA process.

Jeremy was extremely pleased that we carry out the IMBRA requirements perfectly and he complimented us on our diligence and procedures. On his return to Kiev he sent us the following email:

Subject: From the Consular Section of the U.S. Embassy in Kyiv, Ukraine

I would like to thank your staff for making themselves available to discuss important issues relating to IMBRA. We appreciate that you and your colleagues are working hard to do your part to fulfill IMBRA requirements and protect your clientele from domestic violence. Your warm welcome and thoughtful questions ensured that our short meeting was time well spent. If you have future questions relating to IMBRA compliance or the K1 process in general, please feel free to contact me.

Jeremy P. Little | Immigrant Visa Chief | US Embassy Kyiv |

We were very pleased with Jeremy’s response and you can rest assured that we are carrying out the legal requirements as per US law.

  • Jim

    hi Keith –

    Would it be possible to share more information on the statistics you have gathered? I am not sure if will change my approach, but it’s a possibility.

    thanks jim

  • kelly

    HI Keith

    Wow, if nothing else shows how genuine you are this comment certainly does)))). You would think it would be simple that if you want to be in a relationship with a possible future spouse for all the right reasons you want someone close to your own age. To grow old together. a 10-15 year age gap is not so bad at say 35 -20 but when you are 80 and she is 65 that is a long way worse. As for women over 35 building successful relationships that is also no surprise either. Although i think it is more to do with the age gap issue as opposed to a persons age. A 25 year old man i think has just as much luck finding a 20 year old woman on this website as a 40 year old man (me) finding a 37 year old woman(Sveta).

    I think however Keith the worse thing anyone can do is spend months talking on the internet and never going to Ukraine. My course of action was very simple. I created an account and did a search for someone 35-45. Then i saw sveta’s photo and alomst forgot to breath. I said to myself you have no chance with her so I spoke to 3 or 4 different woman over the next two weeks but i had this strong feeling that sveta was the one for me so i sent her a letter. we spoke for another couple of weeks then we had our first video chat which was about 14 months ago now. After that chat i concentrated on sveta and we spoke every day for 2 hours a day. Then i went and visited her in Ukraine. I spend two weeks with her and only her. this is the best way to make your decision, i asked and she said yes. Now i am engaged to the best woman in the world> i am part of her family and friends as she is of mine.

    I just want to say thank you Keith for everything you have done and continue to do. you have my support

    • Jim

      hi Kelly –

      I noticed awhile back you made a comment about people “having rocks in their head”. Now, it appears you are criticizing others and their relationships. When you say “f you want to be in a relationship with a possible future spouse for all the right reasons you want someone close to your own age”. What are you saying about the Ukrainian ladies who have a 10+ year age difference in their profile?


      • kelly

        Hi JIm

        thanks so much for your feedback. I was not criticising anybody for their personal choices in life, nor do i remember the comment about rocks in their heads or the context in which it was made and one can hardly garner any context in which the quote was used in this context, perhaps the application of nositior a socis is obfuscated in this context? I leave this for others to judge.
        In reference to you question I am concerned that it is possible to imply that in some convoluted perception of my words that Ukrainian ladies who accept age gaps of 10+ years are any thing other than they appear.

        I state once again that people with a closer age gap have a better chance of staying together in the long term as was the topic on which i was talking about. I do not why women put 10+ years age gap in the profile, although this is normal for Ukraine. However if things work out they will not be living in Ukraine but perhaps a culture were such large age gaps are not the societal norm. The women leave their country, family, friends, everything they have ever known to take a chance on a new life with their new partner in crime. Ukrainian women may not fully understand the cultural norms outside of Ukraine. I have been through the process, found my fiancée and agree with the statistic that were mentioned. I say nothing more or less than that. I hope that elucidates my thoughts and I apologise if you thought I offered any criticism of any other persons relationships. I wish everyone the very best in their search and I hope everyone finds what they are looking for. I used the website to find someone close to my age because I want to talk to someone who has lived a life so that we have some common ground. If others seek for a different outcome I wish them well. To abridge a loquacious discourse I found someone with 5 years of my age and over 35, the statistics show that it is this combination of age gap and age that works in the long term. Quod erat demonstrandum.

        Best wishes in your search

  • keith

    I received a lot of feedback on this topic and I asked one of our Elite Agencies to comment. Their response is:

    Dear Keith I needed some time to make a letter to you, as I asked my stuff what they think about it and needed their opinion also. Please find below our thoughts as for “why women after 35 are more successful in love and partnership”

    Women after 35:
    – Mature and they know what they want. They do not play games, do not scam you, do not look only for sugar daddies, gifts and money. They have got all this in their early 30s and now they are totally concentrated on honest, true and long-lasting relations.
    – After divorce, often with a child. A woman after divorce knows what it like to be a lonely, stressed and alone. She values tender and good relations and she wants what type of men to avoid. She has a child and she has no time for night clubs, too much shopping and unresponsible way of living. Ukrainian women with children are very family-oriented. When a woman is 35+ her child is already grown up, that makes for her easier to relocate and change a country, easier to travel with you.
    – She is experienced in love and relations, she is feminine, as real womean sexuality starts to develop after 30.
    – She is not so much emotional as younger woman, does not make scandals at every step, as she knows that love needs compromises. She has pure mind and know people and their inner intentions.
    – She is not boring, she has a lot to speak about.
    – She is experienced in sex and knows how to surprise a man, knows what she likes and how to explain this tactfully, without hurting man`s feelings.

    During our 7-years experience we made a conclusion that women after 35 are the best clients for our agency. We appreciate each of our client, but the most successful relations and all marriages in our agency were with women after 35. We have no any problems with women of such age, they really serious and they really interested in result of communication, not only in process. We want to mention- that the best age difference in Ukraine is considered not more, than 10-15 years, so men should know this. Our culture and mentality consider age difference 5-7 years the best and proper for marriage. Hope I will not disappoint your clients, Keith) So if a man is 45 and older- it is absolutely normal and logical to increase age parameters to women 35+ in their profiles. After this, men will be very happy to see new women on your site of older age, and this will make them more happy and successful in their search.

    That is our experience and our opinion in this sphere.

  • Jim

    hi Keith and Kelly –

    Thanks for the responses. Appreciate the efforts. I am not sure what to think, but, we do have some common ground.

    I think I am seeing more opinion, not statistics. I thought there was some statistics that show younger (less than 35) ladies are divorcing or their relationships are failing before marriage.

    From what I can see, Keith only mentioned 1 opinion, and that was related to the ladies age. Nothing was stated
    about the age difference in relationships. Maybe that is common sense. On this website, if I enter the criteria that I want, and using an age range of 5 years, there is about 10 ladies. That is not too many. That is why I have a broad range. Kelly, I am slightly older than you, but my profile just takes the default.
    Meaning I have 18-100 of age. I would be surprised to be committed to anyone less than 25, or over 70, but I read profiles and letters with an open mind.

    Personally, I would rather be with someone who makes me happy with a larger age difference, than someone who is closer in age, but I am not completely happy with. But, that is just me. I do believe in live and let live. I tend to look at morals, beliefs, common interests, lifestyle.

    I am not a fan of when people pass judgement on others, especially when it comes to things like relationships. On more serious issues, like murder, yes I have an opinion obviously. Kelly, in one of your posts you referenced that you are obese. How would you like it if someone questioned your relationship and the chances of long term success given the higher mortality rate of obese men and women? I know you are working on your weight, and I hope/pray you continue, but I don’t think you would like others to pass judgement on your relationship. Or the fact you stated you ‘had a feeling’ about Sveta just by looking at her picture. Some might call that shallow. For me, your relationship is between you and her, not me. Sometimes we voice opinions and that can help, but other times it does come off as interfering. Since I am communicating with a few ladies, and 1 is about 20 years younger, I probably took your comments a little more serious than I should. That said, maybe I need to take a second look at my approach.

    I guess I thought we are all on the same journey and it would be great to provide support, that is why I asked for the statistics. At times I get the feeling UBA wants to be a communication website, instead of trying to facilitate marriages. I agree with you Kelly that the only way to marry someone is to actually visit and meet them. So, why can’t UBA provide some incentives to build relationships and visit? I know you have offered some encouragement to others, and that is very much appreciated.

    I was hoping to take a visit this summer, but maybe I need to think about that. I guess I thought that when UBA was interviewing the ladies, they would also consider the age of the lady and ask more and different questions to see if they are really ready for a lifelong commitment. Keith, one of the comments you made was that ladies over 35 do not play games. Does this mean that it is possible the ladies that are less than 35 on this site are possibly playing games? Maybe I am reading between the lines too much.

    But thanks for the dialogue. At the very least, I will think about my approach and possibly delay my trip until I can establish some communication/relationship with some older ladies.


  • keith

    Hi Jim

    Thank you again for your comment.

    Yes, I think you are reading too much into this and you are not taking the post for the comment that it is.

    Statistically, you will die of cancer if you smoke, but it is your choice. The surgeon general only puts the warning on the cigarette package – he does not insist that you dont smoke.

    Statistically, you will have a better chance of finding a relationship on our site if you choose a lady close to your age range and even better if she is over 35 years of age.

    You are free to choose any lady on the site and form a relationship.

    Our purpose is to help men and ladies find a successful relationship – not to put out a website and try and get every dollar I can from anyone who chooses to use it – and that includes ladies as well as men.

    To this end we will offer support and advice. I sincerely thank Kelly and others who post comments based on their experience as well. Kelly has had success – maybe his comments should be read seriously and considered rather than seen as a personal attack.

    The comment posted by the agency is there opinion – but it is not alone. I agree with their comments 100% as does all the other Elite agencies. I just felt it was better to post another comment rather than my own.

    Too many people use the site and have settings on their profile that makes the chances (the statistics) of success much harder to achieve. We can only offer advice based on statistics and experience

  • Jim

    hi Keith –

    Sure, I understand. I guess when I read the information on the UBA website, I interpreted it differently. I know there is an interview and vetting process of the ladies. For some reason (my mistake) was that all the ladies on UBA were not interested in playing games, finding a sugar daddy or scamming the men as the agency pointed out.

    I know that it will be difficult for myself to find a wife. There not not too many women that want to go walking/running for a couple hours everyday. Trust me, it is difficult for myself to do that, but I do think it is important to be active.

    Anyway, I do agree with you Keith and the smoking analogy. But, not everyone who smokes dies of cancer. My grandfather smoked a pipe since he was a teenager and died in his 80s. That said, I think that is the exception. The same thing applies to UBA. I am not disagreeing with the information, I just thought the vetting process of UBA would be stringent enough so that all the ladies are serious in their search.

    Yes, I did take the comments too personally at first. Like I said, I do believe in letting each of us decide what is best for ourselves. My parents have been married over 50 years and they have only a few years age difference. But, both of my parents had the same morals, lifestyle and interests. They both wanted children (good for me), and believe marriage is a commitment for life. These are just some aspects of their relationship. But, they also were young when they got married (both early 20s). Neither of them were over 35.

    I will rethink my approach. Like I said, at first I was upset at the comment. But, I will keep an open mind.

    Kelly, I do hope and pray everything in your life continues to go well….


    • keith

      Hi Jim

      I think you have misinterpreted our comments again.

      The ladies on our site are NOT interested in playing games, finding a sugar daddy or scamming. We have a vetting process AGAINST this and we will refund men if it does happen.

      The agency is stating that there are many sites where ladies can do this – and that they usually fall into the age range under 35 years of age. Even on a scam site it is more likely that a lady over 35 years old will not play games or scam.

      We did not say that ladies under 35 years old on our site will do this.

      I hope this clarifies it for you?


  • Jim

    hi Keith –

    My apologies. I must have missed something. I thought we were talking about ladies on this site as well as in general (or on other sites).

    Obviously, I hoped UBA was screening ladies to make sure they are marriage minded. So, I must have misunderstood something along the conversation.

    My apologies to everyone.

    thanks jim

  • Jim

    Would it be possible to hear the opposite side of the discussion? Can we hear from some ladies on this site, less than 35, and their thoughts on age difference and the possibility of long term marriage?

    thanks jim

    • keith

      Hi Jim

      Thank you for your comment. Yes we can ask ladies under 35 to give their thoughts on age differences and the possibility of long term marriage, but given the current situation in Ukraine, I suspect that most, if not all will say they see no problem with a large age difference and hope that this leads to marriage and relocation.

      The point of my initial comment is that despite the mans interest in younger ladies and despite the younger ladies appearing to have no issues with an age difference, statistics show that this will not work for them in the long run. Not 100% guaranteed failure, but statistically high.

      This is based on our experience, the experience of agencies who have been in business much longer than we have and also couples who have married and relocated, such as Edward and Aurelia from our San Diego Agency.

      Jim, you are free to choose to correspond with any lady on the site – the choice is yours. However, with the statistics as we know them, it would be less than sincere of me as a site owner not to point out the probabilities.

      When we set up our site we did so with the determination to make it 100% genuine, transparent and fair. We did not set it up to load the site with provacative photos of young ladies to lure men in and get them to part with their money and offer a carefree attitude.

      If you compare the ladies profiles on our site against the profile photos from many other sites you will see what I mean about provocation.

      As a responsible site owner, I have posted this comment to make men aware of the challenges of an age difference. It has created debate – which is great.

  • Jim

    hi Keith –

    Sure, makes sense. I am a little bothered by the comment about “but given the current situation in Ukraine”. I know life can be tough, but this seems that the ladies are not really looking at the man, but instead trying to find a way out of Ukraine.

    But, I do agree with your view. The larger the age gap, it can be a problem. Some work, but I think that’s the exception (as you pointed out as well.

    Part of me realizes that every relationship has challenges, whether it is religion, career, money, culture. So, in some ways I view age as the same thing.

    This is something that would be good in the screening process though. If a lady puts down a large difference, it would be good for the interviewer to really question the lady and try to find out why, as well as it would be good for the lady to put this in her profile. If the lady knows there is a high likelihood of failure, she probably would change her mind and put down a smaller age gap in her profile. At least I hope.

    Many ladies on this site have large age gaps, which does give the impression it is a cultural thing.

    thanks jim


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