The most important principle of international dating

Some men have written to me regarding their dating lives, including questions such as “What’s the most important strategy in international dating?” Well, I would argue that strategies are not as important as principles. More specifically, a principle is like the root of a tree, whereas strategies are like the branches of the tree. Without mastering the fundamental principle, strategies don’t work. Therefore, I’d like to introduce the most important principle of international dating in this blog today. Actually, I think this principle applies to many other areas of life as well.

When you put yourself out there in international dating, the stakes are higher.

When you are involved in something, you invest your time in it. Because there are stakes, you wouldn’t sit back, relax, & be complacent in your love life.

When you put yourself out there to see which woman puts in the effort & reciprocates, you have to use a key method. Invest and test, i.e., you invest in your date and then test this person’s response.

1. Does she appreciate you?

2. Have you seen her invest in this relationship?

3. When you flirt with a woman, does she flirt back?

4. As you reveal your vulnerabilities, does she reciprocate?

5. When you give her more time and energy, does she also give you more time and energy?

Basic principles of international dating

Give more in the micro; maintain your boundary in the macro.

That is to say, when you go out for a date, you are your best self at all times. You wouldn’t hold back as you waited to see whether she was holding back. You are caring, kind, flirtatious, vulnerable, and funny just because you bring your best energy. That could be exactly what you expect from her. In that moment, you’re a giver.

However, if, after a few dates, you don’t get any of that from her in return, you have to pull back and safeguard your energy as well as your time. Basically, investing in a relationship means being a giver in the micro. While getting to know someone, you always give your best vibe. If you don’t get what you want from her, you have to maintain your boundary firmly in the macro!

Personally, I implement this principle in other areas of my life, too. For example, I’ve had meetings with various clients, and some of those meetings went nowhere in the end. I always bring my very best energy to every meeting. If a client doesn’t respect me during a collaboration, I call them out politely and maintain my boundaries really well. I even fired some clients because they violated my standards and crossed my boundaries. Obviously, I’m a giver in the micro, & I firmly maintain my boundaries and stick to my standards in the macro.

What is your boundary?

Do you know your boundaries? Boundaries are necessary everywhere, including in romantic relationships. In fact, research shows that boundaries help couples maintain their relationships. 

So, what are your boundaries? What are your standards? What are your non-negotiables? Please write a comment below and let us know!

“Be sure to bring your best energy to each date!”

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Olga P

Olga loves travelling and learning about different cultures. She enjoys taking photos, trying new foods, and spending time outdoors. A skilled writer, Olga is a language enthusiast as well. She enjoys meeting new people from around the world and trying out new recipes in her kitchen.