Why a relaxed mindset gives you tremendous power in international dating

international dating

Gary Vaynerchuk once said, “I am not a motivational speaker because I don’t want to be one. I don’t like being a mindset coach, but I must acknowledge that mindset actually matters. I just don’t like it.” This is profoundly true because even though “mind and motivation” sounds so corny, it’s the single most important thing in life, including your love life which is characterized by international dating.

If you can’t relax in a relationship, it’s a wrong relationship.

Your body never lies. Never underestimate the power and wisdom of your body. When you feel the contraction rather than the expansion in your body, it’s your body telling you that something isn’t right. Trust your intuition always.

I remember 10 years ago, when I was in a relationship – a friend of mine asked me, “Now you are in a long-term relationship, so you should be relaxed and satisfied. Why can’t you be laid-back and just chill? That’s a bit strange. You are always so nervous and anxious.” That relationship didn’t last for a long time because it ended a few years later. Clearly, I should have trusted my own intuition at the beginning, but I chose to ignore the feelings in my body at that time as I was too young to understand what it was.

Therefore, when you are interacting with an Eastern European lady, you should totally feel the sensations and feelings in your body. Do you feel relaxed or anxious? Do you feel calm or nervous? Listen to your inner voice and observe your inner pilot light. Always trust your intuition and the wisdom of your body.

If you can’t relax, you won’t find the right relationship.

This statement sounds very radical, but please let me explain.

In life, you will attract who you are. In other words, you won’t get what you want; you will only get who you really are. Everything in your life is teaching you who you actually are. That is to say, you are responsible for everything that has happened in your life. No wonder Tom Bilyeu famously said, “Everything is my fault.” He is not blaming himself; he is just saying he is completely responsible for everything in his life. This sense of responsibility makes him remember that he is not supposed to blame anyone because he can always do something about stuff in his life.

Hence, if you can’t relax, this type of anxiety will lead to something that you don’t want as you are constantly looking for reassurance. Strangely, when you desperately need reassurance, it’s harder for you to attract someone that truly loves you.

Let me put it this way: Success doesn’t necessarily lead to happiness. As a matter of fact, happiness leads to success – when you are relaxed and happy, you tend to attract success in an organic way!

So, when you are on an international dating site, you are supposed to take a deep breath and relax first. That will help you prepare a relaxed mindset early on. Then each interaction will be easier and more enjoyable. I know many people have social anxiety and they do not want to communicate with others. But everyone needs connection and a sense of belonging because that is human nature – we all want to be a part of something. We all need a community, trust, love and affection. Indeed, you should choose to feel good feelings in the first place, and then you will have the right energy to meet the right Eastern European lady at the right time.

How a relaxed mindset helps you succeed:

When American author Elizabeth Gilbert was interviewed by a journalist in Australia earlier this year, her comments on success were very inspiring:

Journalist: “What’s your definition of success?”

Elizabeth Gilbert: “My definition of success is relaxation. The current culture is best characterized by hustling, overworking and doing more and more, but I think a much better result is to be relaxed. When someone dares to be relaxed, that’s a truly successful person. A real high achiever.”

That is so true. Relaxation is paramount when it comes to every area of your life. American author Kate Northrup once said, “The more relaxed I am, the more money I make.” Apparently, our modern culture doesn’t value relaxation very much, and that’s a mistake. My mentor is an Australian lady who prioritizes daily relaxation. Whilst most people wake up every morning and immediately check their emails or start working as soon as possible, she actually makes sure that her downtime and play time happen in the morning every day. That means when she wakes up, she dances to the music for at least 1 hour before she does other things!

“An empowered person dares to rest.”

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