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Attracting Ukrainian Brides: How to distinguish yourself from other men

December 16, 2019 at 8.12am by in Dating advice, General information
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There are many men on Ukrainian dating sites, so it’s important to stand out from the crowd. But how can you do it?

Ask the Ukrainian lady what kind of men she is looking for.

Don Draper famously said, “People tell you who they are, but we ignore it – because we want them to be who we want them to be.” That implies: 1) the Ukrainian woman’s answer reveals who she is if you actually listen to her; 2) she tells you what kind of men she is looking for & you need to understand what she says in an objective way.

Further, you need to have long discussions with a woman that you chat with online. During your conversations with her, you will need to find out the following information:

  1. Does she hate her ex? If she hates her exes, she isn’t the ideal candidate. Henry Francis once said, “I have an ex-wife. She bothers me. But I don’t hate her. Hate is a very strong word. I hate the Nazis, but I don’t hate my ex-wife.” That’s a mature and responsible attitude towards exes.
  2. How long was her longest relationship? If her longest relationship was 2-month long & she is 35 years old, it’s a red flag. Normally, a mature woman with a reasonable mindset would have a relationship which lasted for at least one year.

If she asks your past relationships, don’t get emotional, angry or frustrated. You need to show her that you don’t hate your exes & you are a generous person.

You can increase your perceived value by being a challenge, but please don’t be cold.

Spending a week with the lady in Ukraine is better than seeing each other casually for half a year.

After chatting with the Ukrainian lady on the Internet for several months, you should book a flight to Ukraine and meet her in person. Try your best to spend a week with her and you will learn a lot more about this woman. You’ll learn much more than chatting with her online.

In my opinion, “boring dates” are very important. By that I mean you need to talk to each other without alcohol. In this way, you will have a better understanding of each other; you will discover each other’s values and qualities. These are paramount in a long-term, serious relationship.

During your interactions with a Ukrainian woman, you’d better show her that you have your own life and your own passion. You are not needy. Even if you take her somewhere for a vacation, you may try this test: see whether you are able to spend a day together when one person is on the laptop & the other person is reading a book. If you don’t feel awkward during this day, this is probably a sustainable relationship.

When you are talking to her, say this to her, “You can say your opinion if you disagree.” Now she will be able to be honest with you without any concerns.

If she realizes she is with a man she can’t just replace, a switch suddenly flips in her brain.

Once you’ve become irreplaceable, she will think, “This guy is amazing. He is not like anyone else I’ve met. I need to keep him.”

Note that a typical Ukrainian lady secretly fantasizes about meeting “the one” as well. Therefore, you should go for influence, not control. You can’t logically convince her to be with you. If you have to convince her to love you, she already doesn’t love you. If you have to persuade her to respect you, then she doesn’t respect you & never will. That means you can’t control her, but you can influence her decisions.

Don’t take yourself too seriously until it is serious. You have to allow attraction to grow first.

Attraction is about having a woman a little off-balance in the beginning. You can’t be too predictable. The thought you want her to have is, “Where are things going with this guy? I hope he wants to see me again. I wonder what he is like in a relationship. Does he date a lot?”

In the beginning, you want her to only be thinking about the fact that she enjoys your company & she wonders what plans you have in the long term.

Don’t start a relationship without a genuine connection. Needy behavior happens because we start chasing stability instead of growth. A Ukrainian lady wants to feel as though she has proved herself to you in some special way that no other woman has. Women have a deep desire to impress men. Here is how to stop yourself from slipping into needy mode:

  1. Prove you can meet a lot of high-value people. Being open and able to meet people is a quality we should always be exercising, whether in a relationship or not. If you want to expand your network and build your career, this skill is essential.
  2. Get a higher purpose, e.g. build a world that a Ukrainian woman wants to become a part of. Have a wonderful lifestyle that you already enjoy & other people envy.
  3. Know why you slip into needy behavior. Your Ukrainian girlfriend will respect you more if you respect what is important to you. Show her that you have integrity and respect for other parts of your life, all of which is going to make you more high-value in her eyes.
  4. Substitute “needy” activities for “growth” activities. We have to change what we do in order to change how we feel. If you always have to text your girlfriend 100 times a day, it’s time to do a growth activity, e.g. read a book about a topic that you are interested in.
  5. Remind yourself how high your standards are. Never settle for less!

Find a relationship-worthy woman.

First and most importantly, she has to be a woman of integrity. Integrity isn’t about being really serious about everything; it’s about showing that there are expectations and that she can’t get away with certain behavior. It’s about showing your standards clearly so that she knows what to do and what not to do. This doesn’t mean you can’t still be fun, playful, spontaneous and exciting. It is simply knowing what you believe in and not compromising it in order to win a woman over.

In the second place, the ideal candidate needs to be reasonably challenging so that she can keep you interested in the long run. A reasonably challenging woman embraces her likes & dislikes and doesn’t change them to fit into what other people might like. She tells you what she expects in a man. She might say this to you, “I could never be in a relationship like that” when she is seeing a movie with you. She may say, “I can’t stand people who get upset over the little things. Don’t be petty.”  Whatever characteristics she wants a man to have, she can communicate her expectations clearly. Also, she can disagree with you if you do something she disapproves of – she has her opinion, too.

“A high-value man can take initiative.”

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