If you are reading this article now, that means you have a growth mindset rather than a fixed mindset – you believe that you should keep learning and growing. Anything that is not growing is dying. Life is not about happiness; life is about growth. What got you here are two qualities that all successful people possess: 1) the humility to admit you can always learn more; 2) a refusal to accept second-best in your life. Congrats!
Two qualities that all magnetic people share: 1) curiosity; 2) absolute passion.
I interviewed several brides from Ukraine who talked about their lives & the conversations are very interesting.
Me: Please name a few things that you want to do with your life.
Yulia: I want to give myself the gift of good foods, new films, books and experiences as often as possible. I’d like to be adventurous in my tastes and open myself to things I wouldn’t usually try. I always put good things in my body – healthy food, drinks & high-quality skin-care products.
Me: What’s your advice for other brides from Ukraine?
Yulia: Stop wasting time worrying about the things you can’t control. That’s how you manage your emotions.
Me: That’s great advice. You are very fit. How do you keep fit?
Yulia: I like using my body in ways I’ve never tried before – tango and salsa. I appreciate the choice to keep my body and shape and using this instrument every day. My overriding purpose in life is to enjoy physical and mental progress.
Me: What’s your passion in life?
Yelyzaveta: My passion is art. I’m a self-employed artist. I think passion is the key to eliminate neediness. I often tell my friends that they will become magnetic to other people if they are passionate about life. As a single woman from Ukraine, I feel just as strong even without a relationship. My conversation becomes effortless because of my passion.
Me: You are a very attractive lady from Ukraine. Could you talk about how to create a magnetic personality?
Yelyzaveta: I use my emotions in the right ways. Emotion is universal. Emotions are more accessible than information, so I always go beyond the facts when I want to feel inspired.
Me: Which questions should brides from Ukraine ask western men on dates?
Yelyzaveta: Ask him what is the scariest place he has ever been to. Ask him about the most beautiful place he has ever visited. Ask him if he could ever live in another country. Never be afraid to get too deep too quick, as long as you keep it positive.
Me: If a western guy visits you in Ukraine, what questions should he ask you when he stays in Ukraine for a while just to spend time with you?
Yana: If he stays in Ukraine for a week, he may have a question of the day every day. Some good questions are “What book would you want everyone in the world to have read?” “Would you rather have the best career in the world or the best relationship?” Don’t take these questions too seriously. Just relax and have fun on dates.
Me: You are so interesting.
Yana: My motto is don’t wait for interesting people; seek to be interesting. As I see it, people who are sought-after company are great company anywhere. Be just as engaging, interesting and passionate whether you are with three friends or thirty friends. No matter you are on a date or not, stay interesting.
Me: It’s very important to be totally present when you are on a date and enjoy the moment. It seems that you choose being fun over being cool.
Yana: Yes, that’s right. I always read inspiring books, so my bookshelf is full of inspiration – it suggests a compelling future that I’m excited about.
Me: You are one of the most sought-after brides from Ukraine. I think choice is power, right?
Yana: Yes, my advice for single women is: Be in demand. You found a guy before, so you can do it again. If a single lady from Ukraine asks for my advice, I would ask her to take on different things and get outside of her comfort zone. Go out socially at lunchtime. Always engage with people in life and practice conversational skills on everyone. An ultra-confident and unafraid woman is an attractive woman. Having these fundamental beliefs lead to effortless behaviors.
Me: What’s your advice for western men looking for Ukrainian brides?Yana: Stop asking “Does she like me?” and start asking “Is this enough for me?” This puts you back in power and gets rid of insecurity instantly. Just assume everyone likes you and allow attraction to happen organically. Always have standards and stick to them.
Attraction is keeping someone slightly off-balance.
If you are rejected by a woman in a rude way, don’t worry. There is nothing like another woman showing you how attractive you are that makes you realize how much of a moron the other woman is.
If marrying a Ukrainian bride is your dream and you can’t stop thinking about it, you must treat it seriously.
You are going to get some rejections, and that’s okay. The next interaction is going to be better as a result of your previous experiences. When you feel overwhelmed, just focus your attention on what’s right in front of you. Be mindful. Be kind to yourself – the fact that you are reading this blog post means you are already in the top 1%. You are already extraordinary, but I know you can go to the next level.
Fun drives us socially. When you are dating a Ukrainian girlfriend, always remember to be spontaneous and playful. Stay unpredictable.
If you are a single guy looking for love, you may go out and proactively meet new people. Go to the same places frequently and go to a new venue to re-invent yourself & raise your energy. Even if you are having a coffee break at work, you can talk to people at the coffee machine. Also, don’t forget to build an identity outside of work. This will make you a more interesting man.
Stop being a people-pleaser and start looking after your own needs. Enjoy the process; love the journey. Progress is doing something you have never done before. A high-value man is not approval-seeking; he is fun. Doing different things will get you different results, so you should try something new and change your lifestyle when it’s necessary.
Vary your personality. Be nice and be challenging. Learn how to playfully break rapport with women so that you can increase your perceived challenge and perceived value. Remember: high-value men are not liked by everyone. You will have to polarize people.
Show you are attracted to a Ukrainian woman, but she still needs to work to win you. Always maintain the endearing and sweet side of you while doing what pleases you. I understand this is easier said than done, but no genuine change is easy. It will feel uncomfortable and scary at some stage, which is absolutely normal. When you feel the fear, you know you are in the right place because now you are growing. Pro tip: People wouldn’t get bored of you at work if you apply all of these to business.
“A man who can live a beautiful life without a woman is an attractive guy – he is not needy.”
Olga loves travelling and learning about different cultures. She enjoys taking photos, trying new foods, and spending time outdoors. A skilled writer, Olga is a language enthusiast as well. She enjoys meeting new people from around the world and trying out new recipes in her kitchen.
Good advice. Everything contributes to a relationship so it’s not based on just one quality or singular detail.
Here’s something to keep in mind. While we often look for things which attract us to another person, there’s something far more important. It often determines if a relationship remains intact or is ended. Can you guess what it is?
Conflict resolution.
To put it in simple terms, it’s how you resolve your differences and arguments. Let’s say you have a disagreement with your significant other (boyfriend/husband or girlfriend/wife). Maybe the disagreement becomes quite heated and both of you feel your emotions begin to boil.
What do you do? Do you continue the argument until one person backs down or submits? Do you walk away and not talk to each other? Do you realize the argument has become out of control and decide to calm things down?
Here’s the real test of your relationship. Do both of you find a way to resolve your disagreement without leaving a scar on your relationship or do you see it as a winner-take-all situation? If you choose the latter, you’re only creating a lasting divide between the two of you.
In the heat of an argument, it’s easy to forget the bond keeping you together. How you resolve your differences will determine whether you stay together and grow closer over time or drift apart.
Here’s some things to keep in mind next time you see yourself headed for an argument with the one you love. No two people agree on absolutely everything. It’s OK to have differences. Remember, it’s only one event in a long lifetime together. Your love for each other is far greater than any unpleasant singular event.
Ask yourself, do you truly love the person you are with? Do all the positive qualities of your loved one outweigh the negative you see in him/her? Are you truly committed to keeping this relationship and making it better? Is winning the argument really worth the damage it will do to your relationship? You may feel you are right when it comes to a particular argument (maybe you are) but are you willing to hurt the one you love in order to prove your point? Only you can answer these questions. Think about it.
On the other hand, if you or your loved one have an argument and quickly rush to the nuclear option of breaking up as a solution then this relationship is doomed from the start. Be polite, keep your composure, and walk away. If solving an argument by ending a relationship is the answer then one or both of you were never committed to this relationship in the first place. Why hurt each other over trivial matters? Call it a day and move on.
It’s so easy to get along when we are in love. The honeymoon makes us feel like this blissful feeling of unending happiness will last forever. This part of any relationship is easy. It’s when we realize there’s more to a relationship than just euphoria. That’s when the hard work begins.
Love still requires work. Think of love as a fire. In the beginning, it’s so scorching hot and exciting. But, over time that fire loses some of it’s intensity. It doesn’t have to go out completely. Both of you need to help keep that fire burning over time. Sometimes it will smolder and sometimes it will burn hot again. It’s up to you. When a storm comes and threatens to extinguish your fire, it’s up to both of you to keep it burning.
So the next time you find yourself headed for a fight with your loved one, think of the deeper reasons that brought you together and keep you together. If the argument starts to get heated, try to slow things down. Inject some humor. Be a bigger person and admit how you let it get to this point and ask to start over. Calmly. Take a few deep breaths. Go to the bedroom and have passionate sex! The argument can wait until later! Do whatever you feel is necessary to prevent a simple argument from getting out of control. If you truly love each other, it’s not worth letting the argument continue.
Your love for each other began with a hot fire. You got it started and you can definitely keep it going. So do whatever is necessary to keep that fire burning.
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