Online dating and the truth about female psychology

Eastern European women

Have you ever wondered why women don’t ask for what they want? Harvard Business Review published a blog post called “Nice Girls Don’t Ask” in which the researcher maintains that ladies oftentimes get what they settle for at work, as women usually are socialized from a young age not to promote their own interests and to focus on others’ needs instead. Also, many companies’ culture literally penalize women when they do ask for what they want. What’s more, many ladies not only never ask for what they want at work, but also never ask for what they want in relationships. By contrast, men ask for much more at work as well as at home.

  • Women might become frustrated by having to spell out what they truly desire, while men tend to get frustrated by having to play the annoying guessing game.

I’m a strong and independent woman, but when I need my man, he should know it as he loves me. I shouldn’t have to ask, should I?’ – This is what many women are thinking about in reality.

Apparently, mind reading should be avoided in all relationships. Yet sadly, that’s exactly what a lot of women are thinking of. This is especially true in western countries. No wonder more and more guys in western countries are looking for Eastern European women who are generally able to ask for what they want in an honest way. Furthermore, online dating is the main way for western men to meet Eastern European ladies these days.

Well, please let me use female psychology to explain why women think like that – Perhaps not every lady is consciously thinking of that; however, a large number of women may think it feels less romantic / meaningful if they have to ask directly.

  • Not every woman knows exactly what she wants; nonetheless, she is aware of the fact that something isn’t quite right & she thinks her guy is supposed to fix it.

In the western culture, lots of women still think that it’s men’s responsibility to solve problems in romantic relationships. Sad but true.

Truthfully, an individual is 100% responsible for their happiness in life. (If everybody has this attitude and mindset, then this planet will surely become a better place.)

Further, most individuals have never learned how to effectively communicate in relationships. The majority of the population learn things through trial and error (they learn it the hard way). Unfortunately, sometimes they cannot even learn the valuable lessons after a romantic relationship ended in a painful way.

online dating
  • When it comes to emotions, men are not the stronger gender.

Probably he is not as strong as you think he is,” says Wala Truscott, Australian relationship coach and marriage therapist, “My heart genuinely hurts when I hear the defeat of guys and the sound of exhaustion – they seek change desperately & are keen to be the ideal partner that lights up their lady’s heart & soul.”

In Australia, an increasing number of men are looking for Eastern European women because they never really get along well with Australian women. According to Wala Truscott, this is what she often hears:

My ex-wife and I had a genuine connection, yet obviously, she was unhappy. But I really don’t know why.”

“My ex-wife stopped showing love / affection towards me.”

“I was too afraid to tell my ex-wife how unhappy I was in that marriage.”

Wala Truscott claims that most of the distance that is created between two people isn’t because they are not in love, but because the woman is exhausted or avoiding her emotional pain or feelings. Meanwhile, men know women are exhausted; nevertheless, men are in pain as well and they don’t really know how to help their women. (This is nobody’s fault because everyone is doing what they can with what they know & schools and universities never taught us how to communicate effectively in romantic relationships.) That’s why the divorce rate is high in Australia & now many Australian men are looking to marry Eastern European women.

In truth, men want women to open their hearts genuinely. They also want to authentically connect with women, including women’s strengths and weaknesses. They want women to feel safe to do so. Yet, a lot of women expect men to know what to do, but mind reading is hard!

Wala Truscott states that two individuals can sit across from each other on the floor and give each other fullest attention as well as presence. Then two people can be vulnerable and ask for what they want honestly. Just talk without distractions and re-connect by looking into each other’s eyes while talking to each other.

“Online dating is the primary way for guys in western countries to meet Eastern European women.”

  • Harley

    Interesting article, not only are Australian men are seeking Eastern women, but so are men from the USA, England, and even Canada. Yet in my 2.8 yrs with UKB I have found the same in Eastern women as I have found in my own country. Many are unable to express feelings even after a year of communication. Their responses even after this time frame are still talking in the third person response. To me, it seems they play mind games until you make a trip to see them in person, and then even in their presence, they turn you down. My suggestion to anyone who reads this, before you put in the time to communicate via letters and video chat, travel to meet her in person first, save yourself a broken heart later. Establish a connect face to face, and if she agrees, then communicate via letters and video chat and return to see her a 2nd time.

    Reply

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